Sally Albright: The first date back is always the toughest, Harry. Harry Burns: You only had one date. How do you know it's not going to get worse? Sally Albright: How much worse can it get than finishing dinner, having him reach over, pull a hair ou...
Harry Burns: We're talking dream date compared to my horror. It started out fine, she's a very nice person, and we're sitting and we're talking at this Ethiopian restaurant that she wanted to go to. And I was making jokes, you know like, "Hey I didn'...
[BlueStar stock has gone from 19 to 22 7/8 very quickly] Marv: Whew! Stock's going to Pluto, man. Bud Fox: Start unloading! Marv: What? SELL? Bud Fox: Dump it! Dump it all! Where's Lou? Marv: He's over there. [Marv gets on the phone] Marv: Ken, this ...
Rorschach: I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in threatening world. Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pic...
Wolverine: You going to tell me to stay away from your girl? Cyclops: If I had to do that, she wouldn't be my girl. Wolverine: Well, then I guess you've got nothing to worry about, do ya, Cyclops? Cyclops: It must burn you up that a boy like me saved...
Maya: [to Navy SEALs] Quite frankly, I didn't even want to use you guys, with your dip and velcro and all your gear bullshit. I wanted to drop a bomb. But people didn't believe in this lead enough to drop a bomb. So they're using you guys as canaries...
Patroller: [in a vain attempt to escape, Solomon runs into some patrollers who are fixing to hang a trio of slaves] Boy, where are you going? Solomon Northup: To the store, Sir, to Bartholomew's. I was sent there by Mistress Epps. Patroller: [the pat...
King Leonidas: Spartans! Prepare for glory! Daxos: Glory? Have you gone mad? There is no glory to be had now! Only retreat, or surrender or death! King Leonidas: Well, that's an easy choice for us, Arcadian! Spartans never retreat! Spartans never sur...
Partygoer: So Tom, what is it that you do? Tom: I uh, I write greeting cards. Summer: Tom could be a really great architect if he wanted to be. Partygoer: That's unusual, I mean, what made you go from one to the other? Tom: I guess I just figured, wh...
Donald Kaufman: Anyway, listen, I meant to ask you, I need a cool way to kill people. Don't worry, for my script. Charlie Kaufman: I don't write that kind of stuff. Donald Kaufman: Oh, come on, man, please? You're the genius. Charlie Kaufman: Here yo...
Felicia: [in sweet voice] Mummy, maybe a trip to the outback will help me get over this little... phase I'm going through. And you never know, I might meet some lovely country girl. [in tough voice] Felicia: I hereby christen this budget Barbie campe...
Russell Hammond: You, Aaron, are what it's all about. You're real. Your room is real. Your friends are real. Real, man, real. You know? Real. You're more important than all the silly machinery. Silly machinery. And you know it! In eleven years its go...
Anita Miller: [talking to William at the airport, after his story was rejected by Rolling Stone] You look awful, but it's great. You're living your life. You're free of Mom. [William makes a face at her] Anita Miller: Hey, I'll take off work. Let's h...
Carol: [John turns off the radio] Why did you do that? John Milner: I don't like that surfin' shit. Rock and roll's been going down hill ever since Buddy Holly died. Carol: Don't you think the Beach Boys are boss? John Milner: You would, you grungy l...
[Much is just leaving to head Dickon off] Much-the-Miller's-Son: [to Bess] Come on, lass! Give us a kiss and wish me luck! [Bess kisses him and then smacks his face] Bess: 'Urry up and take that ugly face of yours out of 'ere! [Much turns to go] Bess...
[Paul has no money for a subway token] Paul Hackett: Couldn't you just give me one token, please? Subway Attendant: I can't do that. I may lose my job. [Paul looks around and sees no one else in the station] Paul Hackett: Well, who would know... exac...
Ripley: Van Leuwin, why don't you just check out LV426? Van Leuwin: Because I don't have to. There have been people living there for 20 years and they've never complained about any hostile organisms. Ripley: What do you mean? What people? Van Leuwin:...
Constanze Mozart: Stop it! Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: I am stopping it! Slowly. There? See? I've stopped. Now we're going back. Constanze Mozart: No! Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Yes, yes! You don't know where you are! Here, everything goes backwards. Peop...
Carl Bernstein: Boy, that woman was paranoid! At one point I - I suddenly wondered how high up this thing goes, and her paranoia finally got to me, and I thought what we had was so hot that any minute CBS or NBC were going to come in through the wind...
Charlie: All this fool talk about The Louisa. Goin' down the river... Rose: What do you mean? Charlie: I mean we ain't goin' to do nothin' of the sort. Rose: Why, of course we're going! What an absurd idea! Charlie: What an absurd idea! What an absur...
Toby Radloff: How long are you going to be in Delaware? Because I'd really like to see this movie with you. Harvey Pekar: I don't know. I'll be gone about a week. But I'm getting married, so I'll have to bring her along too. Is it a girl flick? Toby ...
