Needy people are like newborns, I have come to realize. One intoxicated night and BAM! You are stuck with this problem. You finally take it home and it wants to keep you up all night and cries when it isn’t sucking on various parts of your anatomy....
Hello." The doctor speaks softly, nervously. Mr White doesn't respond, not even the slightest change of expression. Dr Archer has been thinking. Mulling it over in his head, endlessly, driving himself more insane he thinks than any unfortunate in his...
Young Michael: We haven't hit the hot dog vendor in couple of weeks. Young Tommy Marcano: I don't know Mike... The cart guy ain't like the others. I mean he gets pretty pissed, like crazy when you try to take him off. Young Michael: We can eat hot do...
Cal: [Jacob is standing naked in the men's locker room, legs spread apart] Cal: Would you put on some clothes please? Jacob: Jacob: Oh, I'm sorry. Is this bothering you? Cal: Cal [annoyed] Cal: No! It's not! Jacob: Jacob: Cal, my schwantz is in your ...
Roger: You better get some sleep, too. Peter: I been thinkin'. There's an awful lot of stuff down there that we could use. Roger: I know it. Peter: It's a big place, but they're pretty spread out down there. I think we can outrun 'em. Roger: Hit and ...
Happy: [after cracking open the bank's safe] They wired this thing up with, like, 5,000 volts. What kind of bank does that? Grumpy: A mob bank. I guess the Joker is as crazy as they say. Where's the alarm guy? Happy: Boss told me, when the guy was do...
Kaffee: Whoa. Hold it. We gotta take a boat? Barnes: Yes, sir. To get to the other side of the bay. Kaffee: Nobody said anything about a boat. Barnes: Is there a problem, sir? Kaffee: No, no problem. I'm just not that crazy about boats, that's all. G...
Richard 'Data' Wang: Hey I've got a great idea you guys! Slick shoes! Mikey, Mouth: [together] Slick shoes? ARE YOU CRAZY? Andy: DATA! Francis Fratelli: [Jake tries to push Francis over the log] DON'T PUSH JAKE! Jake Fratelli: I'm not pushing Franci...
Joyce Cooper: Fascist! Nicholas Angel: I beg your pardon? Joyce Cooper: [doing a crossword puzzle] System of government categorized by extreme dictatorship. Seven across. Nicholas Angel: Actually that's fascism. Joyce Cooper: Fascism! Wonderful. Nich...
[Dave sees Hit-Girl studying security cam footage] Dave Lizewski: Is that Frank D'Amico's place? All that security? What are you, crazy? Hit Girl: My mom already died for nothing. So I'm sure as hell not gonna let my dad die for nothing too. Dave Liz...
Frank: Did you pump it? You can't pump it. That'll just flood it. Customer: Ya gotta pump it. Ya can't just hold it down. *That'll* flood it. Frank: You crazy? You pumped it? Customer: Well, ya can't hold it down. Frank: Just turn the key. Customer: ...
Pete: Crazy! No one's ever gonna believe we're a real band. Ulysses Everett McGill: No, it's gonna work. I just gotta get close enough to talk to her. Takin' off with us has got more future than marryin' a guy named Waldrip. I'm Goddamned bona fide! ...
The landlord: He who signs a lease must pay rent. That's the law. Max Bialystock: You miserable wretch! How dare you take the last penny out of a poor man's pocket? The landlord: I have to. I'm a landlord. Max Bialystock: [to God] Oh, Lord, hear my p...
Doyle: Was you in the nut house for hackin' somebody up with a hatchet? Karl: I never used no hatchet that I remember. Mmm. Doyle: So you're just crazy in a retard kind of way, huh? Wouldn't matter to me if you did do violence on someone. I ain't sca...
Officer Keogh: Hey, aren't you Tommy's widow? Tiffany: Yes, I'm Tommy's crazy whore widow. Minus the whore thing, for the most part. Officer Keogh: You want to get a drink sometime? [Tiffany turns around and walks away in disgust] Pat: You shouldn't ...
Ken: Barbie, come with me! Live in my Dream House! I know it's crazy! I know we've just met! Aw, heck - you don't know me from GI Joe. But when I look at you I feel like we were... Ken, Barbie: ...made for each other. Ken, Barbie: [gasp] [Jessie an...
Dr. Owen Fletcher: Kathryn, you're a rational person. You're a trained psychiatrist. You know the difference between what's real and what's not. Dr. Kathryn Railly: And what we say is the truth is what everybody accepts. Right, Owen? I mean, psychiat...
Gorman: [Calling Apone over the radio] Look, uh, Apone. [Apone snaps his fingers] Gorman: Look, we can't have any firing in there. I, uh, I want you to collect magazines from everybody. Hudson: Is he fuckin' crazy? Frost: What do you expect us to use...
Ben Bradlee: Where's the goddamn story? Bob Woodward: The money's the key to whatever this is. Ben Bradlee: Says who? Howard Simons: Deep Throat. Ben Bradlee: Who? Howard Simons: Oh, that's Woodward's garage freak; his source in the executive departm...
Fred Derry: I dreamed I was gonna have my own home. Just a nice little house for my wife and me out in the country... in the suburbs anyway. That's the cock-eyed kind of dream you have when you're overseas. Peggy Stephenson: You don't have to be over...
Vivian: I don't like your manners. Marlowe: And I'm not crazy about yours. I didn't ask to see you. I don't mind if you don't like my manners, I don't like them myself. They are pretty bad. I grieve over them on long winter evenings. I don't mind you...