General Hummel: Hey, girls? You havin' a good time? Little Girl: Yeah. General Hummel: Will you do something for me? It's really - It's really important. I need you to tell your teacher that you need to get back on the boat and go home right now.
Max Fischer: What do you call getting a handjob from Mrs. Calloway in the back of her Jaguar? Magnus Buchan: A fucking lie. Max Fischer: You think I got kicked out because of just the aquarium? Nah, it was the handjob. And you know what else? It was ...
[Outside a strip club] Nicky Gazelle: Do girls really get naked in there? Joey Gazelle: You'll find out when you're twenty-one. Nicky Gazelle: I've seen Mom naked. It's no big deal. Joey Gazelle: Trust me on this one. It's always a big deal.
Margot: Do you send my mother your clippings and your grades from college? Eli: Please stop belittling me. You never gave me the time of day til I started getting good reviews. Margot: Your reviews aren't that good. Eli: But the sales are.
Jeff: I get myself half killed for you and you reward me by stealing my assignments. L.B. Jefferies' Editor: I didn't ask you to stand in the middle of that automobile racetrack. Jeff: You asked for a, something dramatically different. You got it. L....
Joe Adams: [showing Ray and his wife their new mansion in Los Angeles] This foyer is designed to impress anybody who walks in the door. There's a big winding staircase, just like "Gone with the Wind". Ray Charles: [to his wife] We should get our port...
Shellie: If you're gonna slug me, just go ahead and get it over with, you sick bastard. Jack Rafferty: There you go, lying about me again in front of my friends. I have never hit a woman in my life. [Jackie-Boy hits Shellie in the face]
[Riker, LaForge and Cochrane have made humanity's first warp speed test flight] Dr. Zefram Cochrane: Is that Earth? Lieutenant Commander Geordi La Forge: That's it! Dr. Zefram Cochrane: It's so small... Cmdr. William Riker: It's about to get a whole ...
Blanche DuBois: My, but you have an impressive, judicial air. Stanley Kowalski: You know, if I didn't know that you was my wife's sister, I would get ideas about you... Don't play so dumb. You know what.
[Shaun sits down next to Ed, who's playing a videogame, and presses a button on the controller] Videogame Voice: Player 2 has entered the game. Ed: Don't you have work? [Shaun presses a button again and gets up] Videogame Voice: Player 2 has left the...
Sweet Sue: Idiot broads! Here we are, all packed, ready to leave for Miami, and what happens? The saxophone runs off with a Bible salesman, and the bass fiddle gets herself pregnant! Beinstock, I ought to fire you! Beinstock: Me? I'm the manager of t...
Police Inspector: [whispering] Doctors... Lawyers... never get past 60 thousand rupees. He's won 10 million. [pause] Police Inspector: What the hell can a slumdog possibly know? Jamal Malik: [quietly] The answers. [spits out blood] Jamal Malik: [quie...
Divya Narendra: You can't get a meeting with Larry Summers. Cameron Winklevoss: My brother and I pay tuition at this school, we carry a 3.9 GPA at this school, we've won trophies for this school and we'll be rowing in the Olympics for this school. I ...
Reverend Clayton: Well, the prodigal brother. When did you get back? Ain't seen you since the surrender. Come to think of it, I didn't see you at the surrender. Ethan: I don't believe in surrenders. Nope, I've still got my saber, Reverend. Didn't bea...
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: This is exactly what I didn't want. I wanted simple, I wanted in-and-out, I wanted easy money. Zoë: Things always get a little more complicated, don't they, sir? Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Once, just once, I want things to go ac...
Danny Riordan, Clermont Resident: Well, you know, Alvin, there's a lot of hills bigger than Clairmont's between here and Zion. Even if you get that mower running again, it might still break down. Alvin Straight: Well, you're a kind man talking to a s...
Madame Blanc: We must get rid of that bitch of an American girl. Vanish! She must vanish! Make her disappear! Understand? Vanish, she must vanish. She must die! Die! Die! Helena, give me power. Sickness! Sickness! Away with her! Away with trouble. De...
Captain Robau: If I don't report in 15 minutes, evacuate the crew. George Kirk: Sir, we could issue... Captain Robau: There is no help for us out here. Use autopilot... and get off this ship. George Kirk: Aye, Captain. Captain Robau: You're captain n...
Ticket Taker: Hey wait a minute, where is your guardian? Cartman: What? Ticket Taker: I knew it! You paid a homeless guy to get you in. Didn't you? Cartman: Fuck off, you donkey-raping shit eater.
Eric Cartman: I had to ride my bike here. My behind is killing me. Kyle: Your "behind"? Eric Cartman: I have to say "behind" because I get shocked if I say "ass". [VChip activates] Eric Cartman: AGH!
Scott Pilgrim: Wait! We're fighting over Ramona? Matthew Patel: Didn't you get my email explaining the situation? Scott Pilgrim: I skimmed it. Wallace Wells: [shaking head] Mm-mm. Matthew Patel: You will pay for your insolence!
