Bill Cox: Hey, Scooter, did I tell you the one about the two ol' boys pissing off a bridge? Scooter: I don't believe you did. Bill Cox: Well, there were these two ol' boys and they hung their peckers off a bridge to piss. One ol' boy from California,...
Doyle: [Doyle, Vaughan and Karl are in Doyle's truck going to get beer] Not that you two afflicted sumbitches know anything about this, you're sitting in a crew-cab duallie pickup. In some circles, this is considered a piece of automotive art. Vaugha...
Holographic Doctor: Please state the nature of the medical emergency. Dr. Beverly Crusher: Twenty Borg are about to break through that door. We need time to get out of here! Create a diversion! Holographic Doctor: This isn't part of my program! I'm a...
Uncle Charlie: The cities are full of women, middle-aged widows, husbands, dead, husbands who've spent their lives making fortunes, working and working. And then they die and leave their money to their wives, their silly wives. And what do the wives ...
Jack: Yo! Yo! Here's my boy! Here's my boy! But who's your daddy? Now who is your daddy? Miles Raymond: Put me down, Jack. Jack: I'm so proud of you! Let me love you! So tell me everything. Details. I like details. Miles Raymond: No. Jack: What? Mile...
Donkey: Hey, look at this! [he goes up to an information booth and pulls a lever. After some clicking, many mechanized marionettes pop out and begin singing] Clockwork Chorus: Welcome to Duloc, such a perfect town / Here we have some rules, let us la...
Benny Rodriguez: Man, this is baseball. You gotta stop thinking. Just have fun. I mean, if you were having fun you would've caught that ball. You ever have a paper route? Smalls: I helped a guy once. Benny Rodriguez: Okay, well chuck it like you thro...
Cosmo Brown: Why bother to shoot this film? Why not release the old one under a new title? You've seen one, you've seen them all. Don Lockwood: Hey, what'd you say that for? Cosmo Brown: What's the matter? Don Lockwood: That's what that Kathy Selden ...
Kathy: You keep away from me! Just because you're a big movie star, wild parties, swimming pools, you expect every girl to fall in a dead faint at your feet. Well, don't you touch me! Don Lockwood: [chanting] Fear not, sweet lady! I will not molest y...
Martin: [speaking to Debbie for the first time in five years] Debbie, Debbie, Debbie, don't you remember? I'm Martin, I'm Martin, your brother, remember? Debbie, remember back. Martin: [pause] Do you remember how I used to let you ride my horse? And ...
[Kambei is considering the farmer's offer] Kambei Shimada: It's impossible. Katsushiro: Sir! Why not arm them with...? Kambei Shimada: I thought of that, too. Katsushiro: But sir. Kambei Shimada: [pointedly] This would not be a game. A band of forty ...
Alvin Straight: You don't think about getting old when you're young... you shouldn't. Cyclist #1: Must be something good about gettin' old? Alvin Straight: Well I can't imagine anything good about being blind and lame at the same time but, still at m...
Mrs. Lovett: [continues singing] No denying times is hard, sir - / Even harder than the worst pies in London. / Only lard and nothing more - / Is that just revolting? / All greasy and gritty, / It looks like it's molting, / And tastes like - / Well, ...
Lt. Nyota Uhura: [catches Kirk hiding under her roommate's bed] You! James T. Kirk: [scheduled to take the Kobayashi Maru test the next day] Big day tomorrow. Lt. Nyota Uhura: [throws his clothes at him] You're gonna fail. James T. Kirk: Gaila, see y...
Higgins: It's simple economics. Today it's oil, right? In ten or fifteen years, food. Plutonium. Maybe even sooner. Now, what do you think the people are gonna want us to do then? Joe Turner: Ask them? Higgins: Not now - then! Ask 'em when they're ru...
[last lines] 40-Year-Old Mattie: I had the body removed to our plot and I have visited it over the years. No doubt people talk about that. They say, "Well, she hardly knew the man. Isn't she a cranky old maid?" It is true, I have not married. I never...
[Mattie is frustrated with Rooster possibly throwing in with LaBoeuf] Mattie Ross: Give me my $25 back. Hand it over! Rooster Cogburn: I spent it. Mattie Ross: You sorry piece of trash! Rooster Cogburn: I'll get it for you. I'll send it to you. Matti...
Doc Holliday: What did you ever want? Wyatt Earp: Just to live a normal life. Doc Holliday: There's no normal life, Wyatt, it's just life. Get on with it. Wyatt Earp: Don't know how. Doc Holliday: Sure you do. Say goodbye to me. Go grab that spirited...
Billy Ray Valentine: [watches Louis clean his shotgun] You know, you can't just go around and shoot people in the kneecaps with a double-barreled shotgun 'cause you pissed at 'em. Louis Winthorpe III: Why not? Billy Ray Valentine: 'Cause it's called ...
Sarah Connor: Tell me about my son. Kyle Reese: He's about my height. He has your eyes. Sarah Connor: What's he like? Kyle Reese: You trust him. He's got a strength. I'd die for John Connor. Sarah Connor: Well... at least now I know what to name him....
Seth Abrahams: [high on coke] We act like we have all the answers and we're totally invincible, like our parents seem and their parents before them, and I'm sorry, that I have to be the one to say this, but it's fucking bullshit. For instance I know ...