My dad was always snoozing on the couch, like Dagwood Bumstead. He was a lazy motherfucker. God bless him. He was always working on some kind of get-rich-quick scheme. This is what my dad was like: I'd say, Hey, Dad, we studied penguins today in scho...
Morelli was wearing a blazer over a black knit shirt, He took a seat, and his jacket swung wide, exposing the gun at his hip. "Nice piece!" Grandma said. "What is it? Is that a forty-five?" "It's a nine- millimeter." "Don't suppose you'd let me see i...
Lennie Pike: This is stupid. You call me a "stupid idiot?" Well, let me tell you something. You're a "stupid idiot!" Mrs. Marcus: But he'll go all the way to Plaster City. Lennie Pike: So he goes all the way to Plaster City. I don't know about you, b...
Baloo: [singing] Now when you pick a pawpaw / Or a prickly pear/ And you prick a raw paw / Well, next time beware / Don't pick the prickly pear by the paw / When you pick a pear try to use the claw / But you don't need to use the claw / When you pick...
Dwight Dickham: You're a shined up wooden nickel, Mr Palmer. A bully with a bag of tricks. But unlike you, I have one simple belief. That the law is the only thing that's capable of making people equal. Now you may think that Mark Blackwell is white ...
Jezebel: Well, personally, I never went for church names. [Jacob laughs] Jezebel: What? Jacob Singer: Where do you think Jezebel came from? Jezebel: No one calls me that. Jacob Singer: You're such a heathen, Jezzie. How'd I ever get involved with suc...
Itzhak Stern: I'm sorry, Herr Direktor, you're running very late. Here, this is for the Obersturmbahnführer and this is for his niece, it's her birthday, Greta. Greta as in Garbo. Oskar Schindler: By the way, don't *ever* do that to me again. Didn't...
Jacopo: I bid you good afternoon, sir. I am here to purchase your lovely home. Mansion Owner: [laughing] The very cheek! I shall have you horsewhipped! Now get off my property, you vagabond, before I set the dogs on you, you hear? Jacopo: [Jacapo low...
Mr. Bernstein: A fellow will remember a lot of things you wouldn't think he'd remember. You take me. One day, back in 1896, I was crossing over to Jersey on the ferry, and as we pulled out, there was another ferry pulling in, and on it there was a gi...
Female reporter: If you could've found out what Rosebud meant, I bet that would've explained everything. Jerry Thompson: No, I don't think so; no. Mr. Kane was a man who got everything he wanted and then lost it. Maybe Rosebud was something he couldn...
[Discussing a new prisoner who has to spend the night in the box] Dragline: He ain't in the box because of the joke played on him. He back-sassed a free man. They got their rules. We ain't got nothin' to do with that. Would probably have happened to ...
Randal Graves: Fine, just let me borrow your car. Dante Hicks: Why should I loan you my car? Randal Graves: I wanna rent a movie. Dante Hicks: You wanna rent a movie? Randal Graves: I wanna rent a movie! [Dante sighs] Randal Graves: What's that for? ...
[after Vincent and Max load a corpse into the cab's trunk] Vincent: Lets go. Max: Hey, why don't you just take the cab? Vincent: Take the cab? Max: Yeah, you take it. I'll - I'll chill. I'll - I'll just chill. They don't even know who's driving these...
Max: You're full of shit. Vincent: I'm full of shit? You're a monument of it. You even bullshitted yourself, all I am is taking out the garbage, killing bad people. Max: Yeah, well that's what you said. Vincent: You believed me? Max: Then what'd they...
[first lines] Passerby: Well, I want to go over to my place and start, you know, getting it on... Ann: Oh, that's terrible. Mark: Yeah. Do you ever, uh... ballet? Ann: Be thankful. Do you have a quarter for them? Mark: Yes, I do. Ann: [gives it to st...
Shug: [after telling Albert that she and her husband are leaving] Celie is coming with us. Albert: What? Shug: Celie is coming with us to Memphis. Albert: Over my dead body. Shug: You satisfied? That what you want? Albert: [to Celie] NOW What's wrong...
Alex Dimitrios: I'm having a hard time seeing how this is my fault. It's your plan. All I did was get you the man. Le Chiffre: A man who was under surveillance by the British Secret Service... which makes me wonder if I can trust you at all. Alex Dim...
Mr. Bobinsky: Caroline, wait! The mice asked me to give you message. Coraline Jones: The jumping mice? Mr. Bobinsky: They are saying, "Do not go through little door." Do you know such a thing? Coraline Jones: The one behind the wallpaper? But it's al...
Mr. Parker: Dadgummit! Blow out! [on the highway, the car has gotten a flat tire] Mr. Parker: Ah ha! [excitedly gets out of the car] Mother: Not again. Mr. Parker: Four minutes. Time me. Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Actually the Old Man loved it. He...
Steve Rogers: [after Natasha takes the flash drive Steve hid in a vending machine] Where is it? Natasha Romanoff: Safe. Steve Rogers: Do better! Natasha Romanoff: Where did you get it? Steve Rogers: Why would I tell you? Natasha Romanoff: Fury gave i...
David Kleinfeld: [to the Italian dancing with Gail] Hey! Hey! Carlito: What are you doin'? David Kleinfeld: Hey! Carlito: Are you out of your fuckin' mind? David Kleinfeld: Hey, you! Italian at Copa: What's that? David Kleinfeld: Yeah, you! You wop! ...
