Rorschach: Funny, ancient pharaohs looked forward to the end of the world. Hoping the cadavers would rise, and reclaim hearts from golden jars. Must currently be holding breath in anticipation.
Felicia: [to Bernadette] Come on, Bernice. It's so funny you'll laugh so hard your lashes will curl all by themselves.
[trying to start a conversation] Eversmann: You know, it's kind of funny. Beautiful beach, beautiful sun. Could almost be a nice place to visit. "Hoot": Almost.
Biff Tannen: That's about as funny as a screen door on a battleship. Marty McFly: [under his breath] It's "screen door on a submarine," you dork.
It is hard for one who has not had a similar experience to imagine the terror that still gripped Taeko and Mrs. Tamaki and Hiroshi, so intense a terror that afterwards it seemed almost funny.
People often say that the English are very cold fish, very reserved, that they have a way of looking at things – even tragedy – with a sense of irony. There’s some truth in it; it’s pretty stupid of them, though. Humor won’t save you; it do...
BE REAL Bring it on- And let truth be my existence. Value my life- And tell me like it is. Bark at me when I'm wrong- And hug me when I'm right. Praise me if I succeed- And tell me if I fail. Laugh at me if you think I'm funny- And wink at me if you ...
In this world, the thing people fear the most, and what pains people the most— is giving more than they receive. God forbid I cut off more of my fingernail for you than you cut from your fingernail, for me! Heaven forbid I hold my breath in longer ...
If you describe yourself as "Atheist," some people will say, "Don't you mean 'Agnostic'?" I have to reply that I really do mean Atheist. I really do not believe that there is a god - in fact I am convinced that there is not a god (a subtle difference...
Andrew Largeman: What could be ruder than talking about someone else who died when you're in the act of burying a close friend? Sam: Well, what should we do? Andrew Largeman: I don't know. I've only been to one of these things. You appear to be the e...
Great things can be reduced to small things, and small things can be reduced to nothing.
Cormag caught his hand and pulled him back until they were facing each other. “I think you're amazing,” he said, blurting the words out. Lachlan smiled, completely shocked and thrilled by how captivating he found him. He had never thought this co...
Augustus Waters was the Mayor of the Secret City of Cancervania, and he is not replaceable", Isaac began. "Other people will be able to tell you funny stories about Gus, because he was a funny guy, but let me tell you a serious one: A day after I got...
No,' Dahlia said, 'because I think people like him think work is supposed to be drudgery punctuated by very occasional moments of happiness, but when I say happiness, I mostly mean distraction. You know what I mean?' 'No, please elaborate.' 'Okay, sa...
[last lines] Indiana Jones: Anything can happen. It's a long way to Delhi. Willie: No, thanks. No more adventures with you, Dr. Jones. Indiana Jones: Sweetheart, after all the fun we've had together? Willie: If you think I'm going to Delhi with you, ...
Cole Sear: [angrily] I don't like it when people look at me like that! Stanley Cunningham: Like what? Cole Sear: Stop it! Stanley Cunningham: I don't know how else to look, I... Cole Sear: You're a stuttering Stanley! Stanley Cunningham: Excuse me? C...
School Bully: Keith. Keithy. oi, oi. [whistles] Shaun: Talkin' to me? [nods] Shaun: What? School Bully: I never knew Keith Chegwin had a son. Shaun: Piss off. School Bully: What the fuck are they? Shaun: These, I'm wearing them for a bet, what's your...
[Eddie Valiant sits down at the Ink and Paint Club; Marvin Acme squirts ink from his pen on Eddie's shirt and laughs] Eddie Valiant: You think that's funny? Marvin Acme: It's a panic! Eddie Valiant: [grabs Acme by the lapels] You won't think it's fun...
You know I love you,' said the other mother flatly. 'You have a very funny way of showing it,' said Coraline.
Jocko likes salty, Jocko likes sweet, but never bring Jocko any hot sauce, like with jalapenos, because it makes Jocko squirt funny-smelling stuff out his ears.
I can write about all of these bizarre and funny characters in my book, "Diggin' Elroy," because I know them better than anyone else. I have a little bit of all of them in me.
