Harry: I didn't mean to blow her up, I just... lost control. Ron: Brilliant! Hermione: Honestly Ron, it's not funny! Harry was lucky not to be expelled. Harry: I think I was lucky not to have been arrested actually. Ron: I still think it's brilliant.
Finnick Odair: Well, I guess we're not holding hands anymore. Katniss Everdeen: You think that's funny? Finnick Odair: Everytime that cannon goes off, it's music to my ears. I don't care about any of them. Katniss Everdeen: Good to hear.
Ron Weasley: You heard Snape say he's made an Unbreakable Vow? Harry Potter: Yes. What does it mean? Ron Weasley: Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow! Harry Potter: [sarcastic] I worked that much out for myself, funny enough.
Catherine: I'm gonna fucking kill you. I'm gonna fucking kill you. It's not funny, don't laugh. I'm gonna fucking kill you. I'm gonna fucking kill you. I love you so much I'm gonna fucking kill you.
T.E. Lawrence: Look, Ali. If any of your Beduin arrived in Cairo and said: "We've taken Aqaba" the generals would laugh. Sherif Ali: I see. In Cairo you will put off these funny clothes. You'll wear trousers and tell stories of our quaintness and bar...
Caine: Nigga, I know you ain't dumb enough to be showin' niggas the robbery tape, man. What's up with that? O-Dog: Man, cool out, nigga. We just havin' fun with the motherfuckin' tape. Damn, alright, ain't nobody else gonna see the tape. The shit is ...
[Tyrone just backed into Franky Four Fingers' van] Tyrone: I didn't see it there. Vinny: It's a four ton truck, Tyrone. Its not as if it's a packet of fucking peanuts, is it? Tyrone: It was a funny angle. [All three turn and look back at the truck] V...
Rapunzel: So Mother, earlier I was saying tomorrow is a really big day, and you didn't really respond, so I'm just gonna tell you: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! Tada! Mother Gothel: No no no, can't be. I distinctly remember, your birthday was last year. Rapunzel...
Carl Fredricksen: This is crazy. I finally meet my childhood hero and he's trying to kill us. What a joke. Dug: Hey, I know a joke! A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny b...
Mr. Salt: Wonka, how much do you want for the golden goose? Willy Wonka: They're not for sale. Mr. Salt: Name your price. Willy Wonka: She can't have one. Veruca Salt: Who says I can't? Mr. Salt: The man with the funny hat.
Penny Lane: How old are you? William Miller: Eighteen. Penny Lane: Me too! How old are we really? William Miller: Seventeen. Penny Lane: Me too! William Miller: Actually, I'm sixteen. Penny Lane: Me too. Isn't it funny? The truth just sounds differen...
Ray: I'm not being funny. We can't stay here. Ken: We have to stay here until he rings. Ray: Well what if he doesn't ring for two weeks? Ken: Then we stay here for two weeks. Ray: For two weeks? In fucking Bruges? In a room like this? With you? No wa...
Ken: That there is called the Gruuthuse Museum. Ray: They all have funny names, don't they? Ken: Yes, Flemish. In here it says, 'The Belgians twice sheltered fugitive English Kings from being murdered, 1471 and 1651.' Ray: I used to hate history, did...
I find myself thinking back to something I saw on the local news about a year ago. A teen football player had died in a car accident. The cameras showed all his friends after the funeral—these big hulking guys, all in tears, saying, “I loved him....
Ben shook his head. Sitting down he asked, “So, you are Marty, right?” He got an incredulous look in response along with a cautious, “Yeah.” “You look way different dressed like that and without any make up on and stuff. Like a pretty guy a...
[Earl, on liking someone] Because, honestly, the rational part of me know for a rock-solid fact that I would never, ever get with Madison Hartner. But that was just the rational part of me. There's always a stupid irrational part of you, too, and you...
Some of these guys will go on walking long after the laws of biochemistry and handicapping have gone by the boards. There was a guy last year that crawled for two miles at four miles an hour after both of his feet cramped up at the same time, you rem...
The trick here is arbitrary word assignment: that is, any violence engaged in by ourselves or our friends is ipso facto retaliation and counter-terrorism; whatever the enemy does is terrorism, irrespective of facts.’10 We might say, then, that the ...
He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can...
Dante Hicks: What are you writing over there, your memoirs? Randal Graves: I'm battling this jackass on his blog's message boards. Dante Hicks: About what? Randal Graves: About how he's got too much free time and no life. A guy in a wheelchair who's ...
Rudy: Carlito, Mr. Benny Blanco says it's gonna be okay. He wants to send a bottle of champagne over, and he wants you to send Steffie over, when you're ready. Steffie: Carlito, what should I do? Carlito: No problem, Steffie. [to Rudy] Carlito: Steff...
