I didn't audition for 'SNL.' I sent in a tape to 'SNL' the year before I started writing there, but I got the job there through doing stand-up on Fallon.
Crop insurance should be a policy that keeps people from going broke, to make sure they can farm next year, but not to make them rich.
A lot of crops depend on labor, but they're done by farmers that don't communicate with one another. They're never in the same room together.
I have spent more than a decade trying to improve the lives of some of the most vulnerable people on earth, and they've taught me countless lessons.
I started at Pillsbury as a manager in one of their analysis functions, then worked my way up the corporate ladder to become vice president. Moving to Burger King was an important moment in my career.
We as voters, have long hoped that we would get a businessman instead of a politician in order to help fix America's problems. Well, I am that businessman.
Let me tell you what the Cain Doctrine would be, as it relates to Israel if I were president. You mess with Israel, you are messing with the United States of America!
The real problem is clean up the bureaucracy that people have to deal with to become a citizen the right way. And we must truly secure the border. We can't leave it porous.
My message of common-sense solutions is resonating with people. People around the country are starting to know who I am and starting to identify me with solutions, not rhetoric.
Every president, if you watch what they look like when they come into office, you can see their hair turn white because it's such a hard job.
was quick, lively, ingenious and profound, with great activity of mind and great facility of manipulation. I should place him at the head of all the living chemists in France.
Nothing is so dangerous to the progress of the human mind than to assume that our views of science are ultimate, that there are no mysteries in nature, that our triumphs are complete and that there are no new worlds to conquer.
China recognizes and also respects the universality of human rights. We will continue our efforts to promote democracy and the rule of law.
The world economy today is recovering slowly, and there are still some destabilising factors and uncertainties. The underlying impact of the international financial crisis is far from over.
I always knew I wanted to be a writer. I just wasn't sure what I wanted to do as a money-making job.
I'm someone, the same as my girlfriends, when they say what do you think about this, I don't always say they look fabulous. I say what I think.
Some people are born skinny, and that's just the way it is. You can't point a finger at them and say they're ill or anorexic. It isn't fair to people born that way.
If you are talented, you can really do anything. And if your heart is at the right place and you have the passion for it, you can go for it and do it.
It's not just buying the company. Sure, we picked the right companies, and we picked the right management and, most importantly, we've given them the right incentive to perform.
Giving back is something that comes from the heart to me. It's not that I do it because it's the right thing: I do it because I want do it.
It used to be that you would go in to see a CEO, and you would ask them, 'Is your company for sale?' and if they said 'No, we have no interest in selling,' that was sort of the end of the conversation.
