Saddam Hussein: Let's start by building a big statue of me, right over there where that fat kid is standing. Cartman: Hey, don't call me fat buttfucker! [rays shoot from malfunctioning V-chip and kill a demon from hell] Stan: Do it Cartman! Do it! Ca...
Kyle: Ok. Let's try this one more time. Ready, Ike? Kick the baby! Ike Broflovski: Don't kick the baby. Kyle: Kick the baby! [Kicks Ike through a window, causing it to shatter] Sheila Broflovski: Ike! You broke ANOTHER window! That's a bad baby! Baaa...
[Han answers the intercom after comandeering an attack station] Han Solo: [sounding official] Uh, everything's under control. Situation normal. Voice: What happened? Han Solo: [getting nervous] Uh, we had a slight weapons malfunction, but uh... every...
Gold Two: [the Y-wings are running the gauntlet toward the Death Star reactor-port] The guns - they've stopped! Gold Five: [realizes why] Stabilize your rear deflectors... Watch for enemy fighters. Gold Leader: They're coming in! Three marks at 2-10!...
Stan Gursky: Alonzo, heard you had an expensive weekend in Vegas. How did you ever screw up so bad? Alonzo: Hey, I didn't know. It's not my town. I'm not omniscient. Lou Jacobs: The Russians don't care if you have a badge. They'll whack you. You ough...
Alonzo: Why do you wanna be a narc? Jake: I want to protect the streets by ridding it of dangerous drugs. Alonzo: Yeah, but why do you wanna be a narc? Jake: I wanna make detective. Alonzo: There you go. You stick around with me, you'll make it. Unle...
[Arriving back from their first date] Aurora Greenway: Would you like to come in? Garrett Breedlove: I'd rather stick needles in my eyes. Aurora Greenway: Everything would have been just fine, you know, if you hadn't gotten drunk. I was... I... I jus...
Coccotti: You know who I am, Mr. Worley? Clifford Worley: I give up. Who are you? Coccotti: I'm the Anti-Christ. You got me in a vendetta kind of mood. You tell the angels in heaven you never seen evil so singularly personified as you did in the face...
[Truman is trying to leave town in his car, with Meryl. He's gone through various obstacles including traffic jams and a forest fire. Now he's hearing a warning siren] Truman: [suspiciously] What now? [they're coming up to Seahaven Nuclear Power Stat...
Interrogator: I am instructed to inform you that you have been convicted by special tribunal and that unless you are ready to offer your cooperation you are to be executed. Do you understand what I'm telling you? Evey Hammond: Yes. Interrogator: Are ...
Mary: [Mary is looking at the stars outside the Axiom while other passengers pass idly by] Oh! So many stars! Ah. [she sees WALL-E and EVE flying around outside] Mary: Oh! Hey! That's what's-his-name! [backs up, bumps into John] John: Hey! What the-?...
Johnny Cash: You're an angel. June Carter: No, I'm not. Johnny Cash: You've been there with me. June Carter: I had a friend who needed help. You're my friend. Johnny Cash: But I've done so many bad things. June Carter: You've done a few, that's true....
Eddie Valiant: [after discovering the flattened Doom getting up and wobbling to his feet] Holy smoke, he's a Toon! Judge Doom: Surprised? Eddie Valiant: Not really. That lame-brained freeway idea could only be cooked up by a Toon. Judge Doom: Not jus...
Jordan Belfort: People say shit... I mean like, you married your cousin or some stupid shit. Donnie Azoff: Yeah, my wife is my cousin or whatever, but it's not like what you think. Jordan Belfort: Is she like, a first cousin? Donnie Azoff: Her father...
[Blue Star has gone from 24 to 16 1/2 in a very short time] Gordon Gekko: Fox, where the hell are you? I am losing MILLIONS! You got me into this airline and you sure as hell better get me out or the only job you'll ever have on the Street is SWEEPIN...
Charles Xavier: When did you last see her? Erik Lehnsherr: The day I left for Dallas. Charles Xavier: How was she? Erik Lehnsherr: Strong. Driven. Loyal. Charles Xavier: How... how was she? Erik Lehnsherr: She was... We were... I could see why she me...
Solomon Northup: We need a sympathetic ear. If we have an opportunity to explain our situation... Clemens: Who in your estimation is that sympathetic ear? Solomon Northup: The two men I journeyed with. I'm certain they're making inquires at this very...
Ben Wade: They're gonna kill you and your father, William. They're gonna laugh while they do it. I think you know that. William Evans: Call 'em off. Ben Wade: Why should I? William Evans: Because you're not all bad. Ben Wade: Yes, I am. William Evans...
[the Deep Core crew are locked in the kitchen; Coffey is about to nuke the aliens] Lindsey Brigman: Schoenick, your Lieutenant's about to make a real bad career move! Alan "Hippy" Carnes: The guy's crazier than a shit-house rat! Virgil: Schoenick! Li...
Bill Sampson: The Theatuh, the Theatuh - what book of rules says the Theater exists only within some ugly buildings crowded into one square mile of New York City? Or London, Paris or Vienna? Listen, junior. And learn. Want to know what the Theater is...
Doctor in Brooklyn: Why are you depressed, Alvy? Alvy's Mom: Tell Dr. Flicker. [Young Alvy sits, his head down - his mother answers for him] Alvy's Mom: It's something he read. Doctor in Brooklyn: Something he read, huh? Alvy at 9: [his head still do...
