Argus Filch: Students out of bed! Students out of bed! Students out of bed! Minerva McGonagall: They are supposed to be out of bed you blithering idiot. Argus Filch: ...Right, I'm sorry Ma'am. Minerva McGonagall: Actually, Mr. Filch, your timing is i...
Professor Trelawney: Your aura is pulsing! Are you in the beyond? I think you are! Ron: Sure... Professor Trelawney: Look at the cup, tell me what you see! Ron: Oh yeah... well, Harry's got a sort of wonky cross... that's trials and suffering. And, u...
Stan Shunpike: What did you say your name was again? Harry: I didn't. Stan Shunpike: Well, whereabouts are you headed? Harry: The Leaky Cauldron! That's in London. Stan Shunpike: D'you hear that, Ern? The Leaky Cauldron, that's in London. Shrunken He...
[Harry has just successfully conjured a Patronus] Professor Lupin: You know something, Harry? I think you would have given your father a run for his money, and THAT is saying something. [beat] Harry: I was thinking of him... and Mum. Seeing their fac...
Harry: Before, down by the lake when I was with Sirius, I did see someone. That someone made the Dementors go away. Hermione: With a patronus? I heard Snape telling Dumbledore. According to him, only a really powerful wizard could've conjured it. Har...
Louis: What's the matter, Hildy? Hildy Johnson: Don't give me that innocent stuff! What did you pull on Mr. Baldwin THIS time? Louis: Who, me? Hildy Johnson: Yes, you and that albino of yours! Louis: You talkin' about Evangeline? Hildy Johnson: None ...
Nicholas Angel: [about his notebook] This is the most important piece of equipment you will ever own. This notebook has saved my skin more times than I care to remember. Do you use yours? Danny Butterman: Yeah I use it. [shows him a flip animation] N...
Cedric Diggory: I realize I never really thanked you properly for tipping me off about those dragons. Harry: Forget about it. I'm sure you would've done the same for me. Cedric Diggory: Exactly. You know the Prefects' bathroom on the fifth floor? It'...
Barry: How about the Jesus and Mary Chain? Barry's Customer: They always seemed... Barry: They always seemed what? They always seemed really great is what they always seemed. They picked up where your precious Echo left off, and you're sitting around...
Tommy Doyle: I don't like that story anymore. Laurie: I thought King Arthur was your favorite. Tommy Doyle: Not anymore. [takes a stack of comics from under the couch] Laurie: Why do you keep them under there? Tommy Doyle: Mom doesn't like me having ...
Psychiatrist: Tell me, Harold, how many of these, eh, *suicides* have you performed? Harold: An accurate number would be difficult to gauge. Psychiatrist: Well, just give me a rough estimate. Harold: A rough estimate? I'd say [savoring the thought] H...
Motorcycle Officer: License, lady? Maude: I don't have one. I don't believe in them. Motorcycle Officer: How long you been driving, lady? Maude: About 45 minutes, [turning to Harold] Maude: wouldn't you say, Harold? We were hoping to start sooner but...
Hamlet: Now mother, what's the matter? Gertrude: Hamlet, thou hast thy father much offended. Hamlet: Mother, you have *my* father much offended. Gertrude: Come, come, you answer with an idle tongue. Hamlet: Go, go, you question with a wicked tongue! ...
Grandfather: Look, I thought I was supposed to be getting a change of scenery. But so far, I've been in a train and a room, and a car and a room, and a room and a room. Well, maybe that's all right for a bunch of powdered gee-gahs like yourselves, bu...
Capt. Bart Mancuso: [after hearing Jones's findings] Have I got this straight, Jonesy? A $40 million computer tells you you're chasing an earthquake, but you don't believe, and you come up with this on your own? Seaman Jones: Yes, sir. Capt. Bart Man...
[Harry sees a little boy crying, and Fred and George are comforting him] Fred Weasley: What's your name? Nigel 2nd Year: Nigel. George Weasley: It's gonna be fine, Nigel. Fred Weasley: Yeah, it's not as bad as it seems. See? It's fading already. Geor...
Dolores Umbridge: [after Snape leaves] Very well. You give me no choice, Potter. As this is an issue of Ministry security, you leave me with no alternative. The Cruciatus Curse ought to loosen your tongue. Hermione Granger: [glaring at Umbridge] That...
[first lines] Radio announcer: I don't know about you, it's just too hot today, isn't it? And it's going to get even worse. Temperatures up in the mid 30's Celsius, that's the mid 90's Fahrenheit, tomorrow maybe even hitting 100. So please, remember ...
Virginia Woolf: This is my right; it is the right of every human being. I choose not the suffocating anesthetic of the suburbs, but the violent jolt of the Capital, that is my choice. The meanest patient, yes, even the very lowest is allowed some say...
Bert Gordon: How's your hand? Fast Eddie: Fine. Bert Gordon: Good. I'd hate to think I was puttin' my money on a cripple. Fast Eddie: Hey, whaddaya say somethin' like that for? Sarah Packard: It's alright, Eddie. I'm sure Mr. Gordon meant no offense....
Bert Gordon: You're here on a rain check and I know it. You're hangin' on by your nails. You let that glory whistle blow loud and clear for Eddie and you're a wreck on a railroad track... you're a horse that finished last. So don't make trouble, Miss...
