[after catching Harry scribbling on his paper] Professor Severus Snape: Tell me, what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood? [Harry doesn't answer] Professor Severus Snape: You don't know? Well, let's try again. ...
Lauren Gustafson: Mom, my barrettes are not on the couch! Justine Hanna: Wear the blue ones! Lauren Gustafson: I don't want to wear the blue ones. They don't match! Justine Hanna: Did you check the bathroom? Lauren Gustafson: I checked everywhere. Ju...
Col. Hans Landa: Gentlemen, I have no intention of killing Hitler and killing Goebbels and killing Göring and killing Bormann, not to mention winning the war single-handedly for the Allies, only later to find myself standing before a Jewish tribunal...
Lucius: [Bob and Lucius are sitting in a parked car, reminiscing] So now I'm in deep trouble. I mean, one more jolt of this death ray and I'm an epitaph. Somehow I manage to find cover and what does Baron von Ruthless do? Bob: [laughing] He starts mo...
Jackson Bentley: [on his interest in Lawrence and the Arab Revolt] I'm looking for a hero. Prince Feisal: Indeed, you do not seem a romantic man. Jackson Bentley: Oh, no! But certain influential men back home believe the time has come for America to ...
David Gale: We spend our whole life trying to stop death. Eating, inventing, loving, praying, fighting, killing. But what do we really know about death? Just that nobody comes back. Then there comes a point - a moment - in life when your mind outlive...
Merry: Why are there so few of you, when you live so long? Are there Ent children? Treebeard: [Sadly] Burarum. There have been no Entlings for a terrible long count of years. Merry: Why is that? Treebeard: We lost the Entwives. Pippin: Oh, I'm sorry....
Terry: All right. Now I have complied with your every request, would you agree? Rusty: I would. Terry: Good, 'cause now I have one of my own. Run and hide, asshole. Run and hide. If you should be picked up next week buying a hundred-thousand dollar s...
[last lines] Penny Wharvey McGill: Well, we need that ring. Ulysses Everett McGill: Well that ring is at the bottom of a pretty durn big lake. Penny Wharvey McGill: Uh-uh. Ulysses Everett McGill: A 9,000 hectare lake. Penny Wharvey McGill: I don't ca...
Franz Liebkind: Gentlemen. Ve have here a technical problem. Hmm? I do not know if vat ve have here is ze quick burning fuse or ze slow buring fuse. Ja, ja, I must find zis out. [snips dynamite fuse] Franz Liebkind: Zis is critical. [lights fuse with...
Max Bialystock: Don't you see, darling Bloom, glorious Bloom? It's so simple. STEP ONE: We find the worst play ever written, a surefire flop. STEP TWO: I raise a million bucks. Lots of little old ladies out there. STEP THREE: You go back to work on t...
Ed McDonnough: [sobbing] Turn to the right. H.I.: What's the matter, Ed? Ed McDonnough: My "fy-ance" left me. H.I.: [narrating] She said her fiancé had run off with a student cosmetologist, who knew how to ply her feminine wiles. H.I.: [out loud] Th...
Sefton: What is this anyway, a kangaroo court? Why don't you get a rope and do it right? Duke: You make my mouth water. Sefton: You're all wire-happy, boys. You've been in this camp too long. You put two and two together and it comes out four - only ...
James T. Kirk: How did you find me? Christopher Pike: I know you better than you think you do. The first time I found you was in a dive like this. Remember that? You got your ass handed to you. James T. Kirk: No, I didn't. Christopher Pike: You don't...
Billie: Who told you this guy was in here? Lieutenant William Snyder: Nobody. I just know what kind of woman he likes. Going to check all the joy houses till I find him. Billie: Oh, well maybe I could help you, if you tell me his name. Lieutenant Wil...
John: Hello, Paul. You are a perfectly healthy, sane and middle-class male yet last month you ran a straight razor across your wrist. Did you cut yourself because you truly wanted to die or did you just want some attention? Tonight, you'll show me. T...
Higgins: I'm sorry. Joe Turner: You're sorry? You're sorry. Oh, I get it. I get it. You expect me to draw fire, like one of those penny arcade bears that parades back and forth waiting for somebody, somebody very good just to take another shot, and y...
Bryan: I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me...
Jeanine Pettibone: [following the disastrous Stonehenge performance] If it got solved, that would be alright, but it doesn't get solved. I mean what do you think happened out there? What got solved tonight? Ian Faith: For one thing that goes wrong......
R.K. Maroon: Roger, I know this seems pretty painful now, but you'll find someone new. Won't he, Mr. Valiant? Eddie Valiant: Good looking guy like that? Dames will be breaking his doors down. Roger Rabbit: Dames? What dames? [Angrily grabbing Eddie b...
Roger Rabbit: Listen, my philosophy is this: If you don't have a good sense of humor, you're better off dead. Eddie Valiant: You might just get your wish if we don't find out what happened to this. [Tosses a photo at Dolores] Roger Rabbit: What is it...
