You're right, Ruth. You did screw up my career. You screwed it up good. Best thing you ever did, matter of fact. But you know something? It's okay. Because if it was between the church and you, there was no contest. Even with al the ups and downs and...
I laughed but before I could agree with the hairdressers that she was crazy, she said, 'What's the world for if you can't make it up the way you want it?' " 'The way I want it?' " 'Yeah. The way you want it. Don't you want it to be something more tha...
New Rule: America has every right ot bitch about gas prices suddenly shooting up. How could we have known? Oh, wait, there was that teensy, tiny thing about being warned constantly over the last forty years but still creating more urban sprawl, faili...
New Rule: You're never going to pick up women at a coffee shop pretending to be working on your laptop. You don't look like you're sensitive, you look like you're homeless.The last guy to pick up a chick with an Apple was Adam. And when you sit acros...
These days, many well-meaning school districts bring together teachers, coaches, curriculum supervisors, and a cast of thousands to determine what skills your child needs to be successful. Once these "standards" have been established, pacing plans ar...
There are things you should never give up on like your convictions and ambitions but most importantly…you should never give up on you. Keep making those sacrifices, keep running that race, keep advancing beyond your struggles to your eventual goal....
Marty McFly: Okay, everybody let's back up now, huh? Let's back up... let's everybody back up, give him a little bit of room, okay? A little bit of air. It's okay, I know CPR. [to CPR Kid] Marty McFly: I know CPR. CPR Kid: What's CPR? Biff Tannen: [c...
John Twist: Jack used to say, "Ennis Del Mar," he used to say; "I'm gonna bring him up here one of these days, and we'll lick this damn ranch into shape. Had some half-baked notion the two of you was gonna move up here. Build a cabin, help run the pl...
More people are threatened than are beaten up.
One throws up the dust the other gets it in his eye.
The goat that climbs up the rock also has to go down.
Women believe the strangest of lies as long as they are wrapped up in praise.
The frog wanted to be an ox and swelled up until he burst.
By joining the tail to the trunk one makes up the whole elephant.
You can't pick up two melons with one hand.
A pig used to dirt turns its nose up at rice.
Too many hands will row the boat up a mountain.
Do not measure up the wood before the tree is cut down.
If you can't dance well, you'd better not get up.
As long as the fish swims in the water, don't light up the grill.
The body of the pope takes up no more room than the sexton's.
