[US income tax returns are due in 2 days, but Swigert is 200,000 miles away] Jack Swigert: Uh, well, if anyone from the, uh, from the IRS is watching, I... forgot to file my, my, my 1040 return. Um, I meant to do it today, but, uh... Sy Liebergot: [b...
Charlie Kaufman: [voice over] Why didn't I go in? I'm such a chicken. I'm such an idiot. I should have kissed her. I've blown it. I should just go and knock on her door and just kiss her. It would be romantic. It would be something we could someday t...
Felicia: I mean who is the fish that runs this bloody hotel in the middle of nowhere, anyway? Your mother? Tick: No, my wife. Felicia: Ooh, don't tell me you've got an ex-boyfriend tucked away out here somewhere. Tick: No, my wife! I'm married. [the ...
Steve Bolander: I thought, maybe before I leave, we could agree that... that seeing other people while I'm away can't possibly hurt, you know. Laurie Henderson: You mean dating other people? Steve Bolander: I think it would strengthen our relationshi...
[Alvy questions an old man on the street about his sex life] Alvy Singer: With your wife in bed, does she need some kind of artificial stimulation, like, like marijuana? Old man on street: We use a large vibrating egg. Alvy Singer: [walking away] Wel...
[Prince Achmed comes storming in from the palace gardens after being rejected by Princess Jasmine] Prince Achmed: I've never been so insulted! Sultan: Oh, Prince Achmed, you're, you're not... leaving so soon, are you? Prince Achmed: [walks away, pant...
Narrator: For Bretodeau, that little box brought back a lot of memories - Federico Bahamontes winning the '59 Tour de France, and of course, the tragic day when he won all the marbles at playtime The Teacher: [Bretodeau tries to put all his marbles a...
Willard: [voice-over] Everybody wanted me to do it, him most of all. I felt like he was up there, waiting for me to take the pain away. He just wanted to go out like a soldier, standing up, not like some poor, wasted, rag-assed renegade. Even the jun...
Bruce Wayne: We need to send these people away now. Alfred Pennyworth: Those are Bruce Wayne's guests out there, sir. You have a name to maintain. Bruce Wayne: I don't care about my name. Alfred Pennyworth: It's not just your name, sir! It's your fat...
[Gaston and the Beast are battling on the tower] Gaston: It's over, Beast! Belle is mine! [the Beast strikes at Gaston, grabs him and holds him over the edge] Gaston: Let me go! Let me go, please! Don't hurt me! I'll do anything! Anything! [after a t...
Auto Circus Cop: [the Dude asks the Auto Circus Cop if there are any leads on who stole his beater car] Leads, yeah, sure. I'll just check with the boys down at the crime lab, they've got four more detectives working on the case. They got us working ...
Arthur Reeves: [on TV] What kind of city are we running when we depend on the support of a potential madman! [click] Alfred: What rot, sir! Why you're the very model of sanity. Oh by the way, I pressed your tights and put away your exploding gas ball...
Ray: [crying] I killed a little boy! [Ken embraces Ray] Ken: Then save the next little boy. Just go away somewhere, get out of this business, and try to do something good. You're not going to help anybody dead. You're not going to bring that boy back...
Brendan Frye: You gotta come back to me, Em. Emily: No! Brendan Frye: You're in a spot, but I can get you out of it if you just come back to me. Emily: No you're not hearing me! I don't want to be put away and protected. Brendan Frye: Whatever befall...
John Nevins: [picks up the phone after being knocked down by Bourne] Hello? Pamela Landy: This is Pamela Landy, C,I, supervisor. Where do we stand? John Nevins: I... I think he got away... Pamela Landy: Have you locked down the area? John Nevins: Loc...
Lorenzo: [about C] The other night he tried to throw away his baseball cards because he said Mickey Mantle would never pay our rent. Sonny: [laughs] He said that to you? I can't believe that kid. [They all start laughing] Lorenzo: That's not funny. N...
Well people often ask me how I felt growing up with a father who was a politician and who was often away. But when I'm asked that question I often reflect on my inability really to be able to answer it in any relative sense because I never grew up wi...
There will be, in the next generation or so, a pharmacological method of making people love their servitude, and producing dictatorship without tears, so to speak, producing a kind of painless concentration camp for entire societies, so that people w...
It's sad if people think that's (homemaking) a dull existance, [but] you can't just buy an apartment and furnish it and walk away. It's the flowers you choose, the music you play, the smile you have waiting. I want it to be gay and cheerful, a haven ...
Don't ever accuse anyone of being full of pride, undignified and unprofessional when simply they are wise to move away from dishonest schemers. Dishonesty comprise too of layers of lies simply casted for impressive appearances. There are times too th...
I know we are miles and miles away from one another, but I always believed that as long as our souls are connected to each other, the flame of our love will burn forever. Only souls can resist death, our physical connection is meaningless... you alwa...
