Rufus T. Firefly: Here are the plans of war. They're as valuable as your life. And that's putting them pretty cheap. Watch them like a cat watched her kittens. Have you ever had kittens? No, of course not, you're too busy running around playing bridg...
Prosecutor: Chicolini, you are charged with high treason, and if found guilty, you will be shot. Chicolini: I object. Prosecutor: You object? On what grounds? Chicolini: I couldn't think of anything else to say. Rufus T. Firefly: Objection sustained....
General Rogard: That missile is targeted to the giant's current position! WHERE'S THE GIANT, MANSLEY? Kent Mansley: Oooh... We can duck and cover! There's a fallout shelter not far from... General Rogard: There's no way to survive this thing, you idi...
[During a war game with BB guns] Royal: [on top of a roof, aiming at Chas] Hold it Chassie. Hold it right there. Young Chas Tenenbaum: What are you doing? You're on my team! Royal: Ha-ha! There are no teams! [he shoots at Chas, hitting his hand. Chas...
He shot to his feet, faced off against her. "No more mercy for ye, Valkyrie." Holding nothing back, he launched a haymaker at her head. She ducked and laughed. "That accent you work so hard to hide is coming out! Are ye feckin' Oirish this time? Eh, ...
In a lot of ways I am like a duck. I love the water; I have large, web-like feet; and I could never kill a man, unless that man tasted like soggy bread and I decided to eat him.
Is there one in particular, Tennyson?” Henry said, ducking out from under her arm. “I could arrange a meeting.” “Yeah, the one from Texas…what’s his name?” “That would be Dylan. But he’s a nice guy and you’d break his heart. He dr...
New Rule: If we want to find a place to cut government waste, we must start with the DEA rubber duck. Yes, on the DEA's website you can buy a rubber ducky with a DEA badge and a cop's hat. Which I recommend doing, because they're a great place to hid...
My whole life is out here-the whole of my life...I'd come here naked, as a boy-straight from that river out there-throw my clothes on the floor and climb into that loft and lie there dreaming in the hay...All those summer days-scouring the banks of t...
…deceitful!” she decided with a little bounce of fury that briefly ballooned the silk of her trousers. “There! You deceitful …” “Gillia…” “…misleading, dishonest, insincere…” “Those are all the same words, Gill—” “Ooh!...
Rufus T. Firefly: Not that I care, but where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Rufus T. Firefly: I bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end. Rufus T. Firefly: No wonder he passed away. Mrs. Te...
Rufus T. Firefly: And now, members of the cabinet... [pounds gavel] Rufus T. Firefly: we'll take up old business. Cabinet Member: I wish to discuss the tariff. Rufus T. Firefly: Sit down, that's new business. No old business? Very well... [pounds gav...
Rufus T. Firefly: Now, what is it that has four pairs of pants, lives in Philadelphia, and it never rains but it pours? Chicolini: Atsa good one. I give you three guesses. Rufus T. Firefly: Now let me see. Has four pair of pants, lives in Philadelphi...
Rufus T. Firefly: [singing] If any form of pleasure is exhibited, report to me and it will be prohibited! I'll put my foot down, so shall it be... this is the land of the free! The last man nearly ruined this place he didn't know what to do with it. ...
Ambassador Trentino: Now will you tell me what happened on Saturday? Chicolini: I'm glad you ask me. We follow this man down to a roadhouse, and at this roadhouse he meet a married lady. Ambassador Trentino: A married lady? Chicolini: Yeah, I think i...
Rufus T. Firefly: Dig trenches, with our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made. Here, run out and get some trenches. Wait a minute, get 'em this high... [gestures to his chin] Rufus T. Fi...
Buddy Threadgoode Jr.: Mommy, I can hit! You should see me. Aunt Idgie. She hit me in the back with a curveball. I didn't duck, and I hardly cried. Ruth: She hit you? Well, she did that to me once too but I think I did cry. Buddy Threadgoode Jr.: Mam...
Skinner: The soup! Where is the soup? Out of my way. Move it, garbage boy! [sees a ladle in Linguini's hand] Skinner: You are COOKING? How DARE you cook in MY kitchen! Where do you get the gall to even attempt something so monumentally idiotic? I sho...
Colette: Table five coming up right now. Skinner: Coming down the line. Colette: Set. Hot. Open oven. Skinner: Coming around. Colette: Oui, chef. One filet mignon, three lamb, two duck. Skinner: Fire those soufflés for table six, ja? Colette: Five m...
Aladdin: Wow. The palace looks pretty amazing, huh? Princess Jasmine: [glumly] Oh... It's wonderful. Aladdin: I wonder what it'd be like to live there, and have servants, and valets. Princess Jasmine: Oh, sure. People who tell you where to go and how...
I hated cats. I was a dog lover," Des says with a shrug. "What's the point of a cat? They're not affectionate. But that's because it's not my cat. I mean, your wife wouldn't jump on my lap. That's because she's your wife, not mine. Until you have you...
