I shave my face like a car. I speed through car washes, but I brake for love.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.When love knocked at my door, I prayed to God and thanked Him for letting me live in a Porta-potty.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.Advice about love: When the green grape turns red, it’s time to separate the socks from the mittens.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.We made love sweet and gentle, like strawberry jelly. Peanut butter makes me horny.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.Not only is my lover invisible, but she’s also nonexistent. Talk about a cheap date!
Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.Asking me if I’m in love is like asking a mortician if now is the best time to die.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.I never knew what love was until after I got divorced. But I’ve always been a bit dyslexic.
Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.I live for the moment and love for eternity. I mean I’d like to, but I’m too impatient for either.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.The fact that we’re not lovers makes us more like bees and flowers than rabbits.
Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.My love is self-contained, like chips in a bag. Don’t eat it all at once.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.When I die I’m donating my body to science, because everybody loves a free buffet.
Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.I love food that carries food. Run, waiter, before I eat you too.
Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.We made eyes at each other, and then we made love. We also made other things too, like meatloaf.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.Love is all around. I don’t need your leftovers, ma’am. Not unless you’re offering meatloaf.
Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.