One of the greatest acts of service you can do is to find someone who is secretly lonely and be a friend to them, if only for a day.
Mirrors have three purposes. To show you who you are. To show you who you were. And to show you who you want to be.
Only those willing to truly risk everything will gain everything. No person ever rose to greatness without the willingness to lose it all.
Sometimes we need to look at everything going wrong in our lives and admit to ourselves, "I am the only common denominator here.
Your penis betrayed you, son. Made you think stupid. It won't be the last time that happens.
My dad always used to tell me __________________. My dad never told me anything. He had nothing to say, and even less to say to me.
David and Dad didn't get along too well growing up. I mean we all got along, but it was harder on David, because David wasn't going to be the son that Dad wanted. But now they're like best friends.
You can't be two people in your brain, one rock dude and a dad - there's something in the middle of them, and that's really what you are and that's going to make you the best dad - not when you try to be one or the other.
I will never have greater respect than for the man that realizes he was wrong and graciously admits it without a single excuse.
I am never going to be less sensitive so that you feel better about being judgmental toward me.
Our greatest mistakes, if we look at them, and digest them, and interact with them, and learn from them… they can be the greatest moments of our lives.
Be a little less obsessed with how I live my life and a little more obsessed with how you live your own.
(I should mention I attended a Christian elementary school where “my dad’s hermeneutic can beat up your dad’s hermeneutic” served as legit schoolyard banter.)
I never mind talking about my dad. I'm proud of who he is, and being his son is one of the things I'm most proud of. To be constantly compared to someone so brilliant, who happens to be your dad, is cool.
My dad used to love Steely Dan, the Stones, Jethro Tull and all that. There was always Steely Dan going in my dad's car, but I remember The Royal Scam in particular because it has 'Kid Charlemagne' on it.
Dad bought me a toy drum one Christmas, and I eventually destroyed it. I wanted a real drum and he bought me a snare drum. Dad continued to buy me one drum after the other.
My views about God come from my dad. Dad told me that he believed Nature, which to him included humankind, to be so beautiful, so magnificent, that there had to be something behind it all.
My parents weren't married. It wasn't like my dad up and left. I maintained a steady relationship with my grandparents. My dad's mother is my nana, and I'm closer to her than almost anybody in this world.
The problem with me, as far as getting married and having a family, is that my comedy is so important to me. So I don't know if I'll ever be as good a dad as my dad.
My dad introduced me to baseball. Then one of my friends asked if I could play on a team; my dad said I could, and I just fell in love with the game.
My goal is for Gunnar to outlive me. That's the way it should be. My dream is for him to be a dad himself one day, so he can find out all the anxiety that kids bring to their dads.
