[after all the other Senators walk out] Jefferson Smith: Oh, Mr. President, we seem to be alone. I, I'm not complaining for a social reason; it's just, I think it'd be a pity if these gentlemen missed any of this, and... [Clarissa starts waving from ...
[from the 30th Anniversary Edition - additional scenes] Darlene Davies: So you don't think they'll find some kind of virus, or germ? Reverend John Hicks: No. Those creatures were demons, creatures of Satan inhabiting the bodies of our dead. And the d...
Clark: I think you're all fucked in the head. We're ten hours from the fucking fun park and you want to bail out. Well I'll tell you something. This is no longer a vacation. It's a quest. It's a quest for fun. You're gonna have fun, and I'm gonna hav...
[Clark has just been pulled over by a Colorado motorcycle cop] Clark: Hi officer, what's the problem? Motorcycle Cop: Get out of the car! [Clark exits from the car] Clark: I don't think I was speeding. Was I weaving or something? Motorcycle Cop: Shut...
Mechanic 2: Ain't never seen anyone so shit-all stupid as you driving off that road. You musta got manure for your brains. Clark: Yeah, well, I'm from out of town. So, what's the bill? Come on, come on, how much? Mechanic 1: How much you got? Clark: ...
Jeannine: [In a McDonalds restaurant booth Conrad sits with Jeannine, the suicide attempt scars on Conrad's wrist are displayed] Did it hurt? Conrad "Con" Jarrett: I don't remember, really. Jeannine: You don't want to talk about it? Conrad "Con" Jarr...
King: [while cleaning the latrines] I'm too short for this shit, man. 39 and a wake-up, a pause for the cause and I'm a gone motherfucker. Back to the world! Crawford: Hey, I broke a hundred the other day, 92 left to go. April 17th, home to Californi...
[Jack sees Mr. Cotton's parot] Jack Sparrow: Well! I'm actually feeling rather good about this. I think we all arrived at a very special place eh? [Governor acts disgusted] Jack Sparrow: Spiritually. Ecumenically. Grammatically. [Walks over to Common...
Cornwall Cousins: Charles, is Jack Barry single? Charles Van Doren: I think so. Cornwall Cousins: My roommate has a huge crush on him, she wants you to introduce her. Cornwall Cousins: What's Dave Garroway like? Charles Van Doren: Cheap. Cornwall Aun...
Glen: How many Polacks it take to screw up a lightbulb? H.I.: I don't know, Glen. One? Glen: Nope, it takes three. [Glen laughs. H.I. doesn't] Glen: Wait a minute, I told it wrong. Here, I'm startin' over: How come it takes three Polacks to screw up ...
Dot: [GASPS after seeing Nathan Jr] What's his name? Ed McDonnough: Uh... Hi... Hi Junior, till we think of a better one. Dot: Why don't ya call him Jason? l just love biblical names. If I had another little boy, I'd name him Jason, Caleb or Tab. [GA...
H.I.: That night, I had a dream. I drifted off thinking about happiness, birth and new life, But now I was haunted by a vision of... He was horrible. The lone biker of apocalypse. A man with all the powers of Hell at his command. He could turn turn t...
Mr. White: [snatches Joe's address book] Give me this fucking thing. Joe: What do you think you're doing? Give me back my book! Mr. White: I'm sick of fucking hearing it Joe, I'll give it back to you when we leave. Joe: What do you mean, give it to m...
Charlie: Hey Raymond, remember today when the doctor was asking you those questions? How'd you know the answers? Raymond: [while brushing his teeth at the same time, Charlie can't make out what he said] I see it. Charlie: What? Stop that for a second...
[last lines] Niki Lauda: Of course he didn't listen to me. For James, one world title was enough. He had proved what he needed to prove. To himself and anyone who doubted him. And two years later, he retired. When I saw him next in London, seven year...
[Following Lauda's press conference, Hunt approaches the British journalist that offended Lauda] British Journalish: James, are you all right? James Hunt: Good, yeah. Listen, I think I've got something for you on that last question, about Niki. Briti...
General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you recall what Clemenceau once said about war? Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No, I don't think I do, sir, no. General Jack D. Ripper: He said war was too important to be left to the generals. When he said that, 50...
Stanley Kowalski: Take a look at yourself here in a worn-out Mardi Gras outfit, rented for 50 cents from some rag-picker. And with a crazy crown on. Now what kind of a queen do you think you are? Do you know that I've been on to you from the start, a...
Jack: Listen, man. Cammi gets off in an hour, so I was thinking I'd just hang around and have a drink, and make sure she gets home safe. Miles Raymond: You're joking, right? Jack: No. Miles Raymond: Un-fucking-believable. Can't we just... go back to ...
Joe: [trying to get Jerry to face reality regarding his engagement to Osgood] Jerry, Jerry, will you take my advice? Forget about the whole thing, will ya? Just keep telling yourself: you're a boy, you're a boy. Jerry: I'm a boy. Joe: That's the boy....
Mrs. Cunningham: You know, I read of a case once. I think it would be a wonderful idea! I can take him out in the car, and when we get to a very lonely spot, knock him on the head with a hammer, pour gasoline over him and over the car, and set the wh...
