Ed Crane: I was the principal barber now. I hired a new man for the second chair. I'd hired the guy who did the least gabbing when he came in for an interview, but I guess the new man had only kept quiet because he was nervous. Once he had the job he...
Stan: Why didn't you ask them any questions? Vinny Gambini: Huh? Ask who questions? Bill: The witnesses! You know you could have asked questions, didn't you, Vin? Stan: Damn it, Vinnie! Maybe if you'd put up some kind of a fight, you could have gotte...
Clark Griswald: Roy... can I call you Roy? Have you even driven cross-country? Roy Walley: Oh, hell yes. Drove the whole family to Florida. Worst two weeks I ever spent in my life. The smell from the back seat was terrible. Clark Griswald: Ooooh. Ooo...
[last lines] Chief Bromden: Mac... they said you escaped. I knew you wouldn't leave without me. I was waiting for you. Now we can make it, Mac; I feel big as a damn mountain. [he suddenly sees the lobotomy scars] Chief Bromden: Oh, no... Chief Bromde...
Inigo Montoya: You are sure nobody's follow us? Vizzini: As I told you, it would be absolutely, totally, and in all other ways inconceivable. No one in Guilder knows what we've done, and no one in Florin could have gotten here so fast. Out of curiosi...
The Wolf: Strip. Jules: All the way? The Wolf: To your bare ass. Vincent: Is this necessary? The Wolf: Yes. You know what you guys look like? Jules: What? The Wolf: Like a couple of guys who just blew off somebody's head! [to Jimmie] The Wolf: Now Ji...
Vincent: Remember, I just got back from Amsterdam. Lance: Am I a nigger? Are we in Inglewood? No... You're in my home. White people who know the difference between good shit and bad shit, this is the house they come to. Now, my shit, I'll take the Pe...
Chris Taylor: Any way you cut it, Barnes is a fucking murderer. King: Right on. Rhah: Taylor, I remember when you first came in here telling me how much you admired the bastard. Chris Taylor: I was wrong. Rhah: Wrong? You ain't never been right about...
Judge Arse: [disgusted] The evidence before the court is incontrovertible, there's no need for the jury to retire! In all my years of judging, I have never heard before some one more deserving of the full penalty of law! The way you made them suffer,...
FBI Director Womack: What do you know about V.X. gas? Dr. Stanley Goodspeed: Liquid; failed pesticide; discovered by mistake in 1952. Uhh, actually, it's kind of like champagne that way. The Franciscan monks thought they were making white wine. Someh...
Charlie: He's not crazy, he's not retarded but he's here. Dr. Bruner: He's an autistic savant. People like him used to be called idiot savants. There's certain deficiencies, certain abilities that impairs him. Charlie: So he's retarded. Dr. Bruner: A...
John Glenn: Annie, listen to me, OK? You listening? If you don't want the Vice President or the TV networks or anybody else to come into the house, then that's it, as far as I'm concerned. They are NOT coming in, and I will back you all the way, a hu...
Joey Gazelle: [pulling her aside] Listen to me. That piece... that's not just any hot piece. Tommy used it to burn a dirty cop. Teresa Gazelle: Oh no, Joe. Joey Gazelle: Yeah. No, no. Listen. On top of it, that kid's out there right now. The cops are...
Skinner: The soup! Where is the soup? Out of my way. Move it, garbage boy! [sees a ladle in Linguini's hand] Skinner: You are COOKING? How DARE you cook in MY kitchen! Where do you get the gall to even attempt something so monumentally idiotic? I sho...
Linguini: [as Collette storms away] Colette. Colette! [to Remy] Linguini: Oh, it's over Little Chef, I can't do it anymore. [he runs outside and blocks Colette's motorcycle] Linguini: Colette! Wait, wait, wait. Don't motorcycle away. Look, I'm no goo...
Peter Bradley: [interviewing Eli Cash on television] Now, your previous novel... Eli: Yes, Wildcat. Peter Bradley: Not a success. Why? Eli: Well... Wildcat was written in a kind of obsolete vernacular... [long pause as he starts to become spaced out]...
Stanley Kowalski: Now that's how I'm gonna clear the table. Don't you ever talk that way to me. 'Pig,' 'Pollack,' 'disgusting,' 'vulgar,' 'greasy.' Those kind of words have been on your tongue and your sister's tongue just too much around here. What ...
[to the telegraph operator] Young Charlie: Mrs. Henderson, do you believe in telepathy? Mrs. Henderson: Well, I ought to. That's my business. Young Charlie: Oh, not telegraphy. Mental telepathy. Like, well, suppose you have a thought, and suppose the...
Ed: What happened to your hand, man? Pete: I got mugged on the way home. Ed: By who? Pete: I dunno by some crackheads or something, one of them bit me. Ed: Why'd they bite you? Pete: I don't know, I didn't stop to ask them! Now, I have a splitting he...
Sulu: Attention: John Harrison. This is Captain Hikaru Sulu of the USS Enterprise. A shuttle of highly trained officers is on its way to your location. If you do not surrender to them immediately, I will unleash the entire payload of advanced long-ra...
Marylin Delpy: What are you doing? Mark Zuckerberg: Checking in to see how it's going in Bosnia. Marylin Delpy: Bosnia. They don't have roads, but they have Facebook. [Mark says nothing] Marylin Delpy: You must really hate the Winklevosses. Mark Zuck...
