I’m winning over fans every day. They’re not my fans, but at least they’re losing and I’m winning.
This Book is Not FOR SALEWhat do you call a schooner in a wine glass? Port.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI just made ice cream. Accidentally. I made regular cream, and then winter kicked in.
This Book is Not FOR SALEHe has wisdom beyond his years. He’s 87-years-old, and he’s at least as wise as an 88-year-old.
This Book is Not FOR SALEThis world is nothing more than fresh white underwear, and I’m going to leave my mark on it.
This Book is Not FOR SALECoaching 101: First you build the team, and then you build the torture chamber for underperformers.
This Book Has No TitleThe boxer had two black eyes. But that’s to be expected, since he was from Africa.
This Book Has No TitleWere you aware that my sister looks like my brother? They both look nonexistent.
This Book Has No TitleI want to drum up interest for instruments that are played by beating them with sticks.
This Book Has No TitleIf I had chlorophyll instead of blood, I’d have ivy in my IV (not Roman numeral four).
This Book Has No TitleLove will wreck your heart like a derailed train. So choo-choose your partner wisely.
This Book Has No TitleA farm is a business, and I ran mine into the ground. The next year it grew back.
This Book Has No TitleLoyalty is for the dogs. Count me among the cats. And count me twice—once for each of my faces.
This Book Has No TitleSomebody needs to pet me, and I guess that somebody is me. My cat is busy sleeping.
This Book Has No TitleDon’t expect my hand to extend out of her vagina and accept the charity of strangers.
This Book Has No Title