Quotes of: Comic-book Keyword

Not only did I not get it done, but I’m over budget too. I’m like a politician.

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I put all my eggs in one basket, and then I jizzed all over them. I'm a natural politician.

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I'm proud to be a Mick, even though I'm not Irish
 My middle name is Mickey, though. Actually, I’m lying.

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I keep my valuable things locked up. Everybody does. Therefore, criminals must be valuable.

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Nobody can stop me. But only because I haven’t started yet.

This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks

Whenever I schedule an appointment, my general rule of thumb is, tomorrow is better than yesterday.

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I don't like questions at all if they are anything like how I like my mashed potatoes: loaded.

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I had a fistful of huhs, and a Ziploc bag full of questions—and a sandwich. But I didn’t bring them, because my lunchbox was full of love.

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The only questions I’ll ask my clone, are ones in which I already know the answer. This is the path to self-discovery.

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Dear Ian, I felt good. I felt like a Christian to the T. Also to the Chris, Ian.

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Her name is Angela, though she’s no angel. Dad, I can’t believe she replenishes us.

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If you can listen to or read anything, but misspelled words offend you, raise your hadn.

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My advice is to write during commercial breaks, and read while your favorite TV show is on mute.

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Even a broken mirror isn’t broken if it allows you to see who you really are—cracked down the middle in your duality.

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Is there relationship insurance? You know, in case someone steals your significant other? If not, there should be.

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I’ve only been with my girlfriend for three days, but it feels like a lifetime—the lifetime of a gnat.

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I respect a man not for the clothes he wears, but for the clothes he doesn’t wear. Yes, nudity is an admirable thing indeed.

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My facial features smell as rugged as a rose looks. Isn’t my nose the most romantically smelling thing?

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I’m romantic. I’ll try to make your bed while you’re still sleeping in it.

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I started out on a treadmill—and I just did my first marathon. And all while sitting in a wheelchair.


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The question is not how much work are you willing to put in, but what are you willing to take out? Success is sacrifice.

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