Quotes of: Comic-book Keyword

A pen is like a switchblade you can actually write with—and pull off a successful mugging with.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I’m now solidly in my mid-thirties. I turned thirty, three days ago.

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I’m putty in her hands. Out of her hands, I’m more like clay. 

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College has given me the confidence I need to fail. 

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I can read lips. Especially if they have words tattooed on them.

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It’s easier to pick apart what is, than put together what isn’t.

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The police made sure he wasn’t dead. Then they killed him.

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I’d eat a mosquito to satisfy my hunger for an itch.

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Divorce is the second worst event in a person’s life. The worst event, of course, is marriage.

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I’d like a doggy bag to take home my leftover grilled canine burger.

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I like remembering her as she was—a fantasy of the future.

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My goal is to do the most with the least—get the maximum output with the minimum input.

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My hero’s hero is not necessarily my hero, unless my clone’s hero is my clone’s clone.

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We all have to have something to hold on to, even if it’s our own torso.

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My stomach’s upset. I must have accidentally said something to insult it.

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I speak the language of love. That’s right, I speak Russian.

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4 am—if I’m ever up that early, it’s because I’m up that late.

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Today is Wednesday. That makes it my Wednesday. It also makes Tuesday my Monday.

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It is possible to be a retard and a politician. In fact, it’s almost a prerequisite.

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Instead of burning the midnight oil, you should try selling it.

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I’m reminded of a story I told my 5th grade class in the 4th grade.

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