Vilos Cohaagen: [Cohaagen has Quaid strapped into a memory machine and is about to turn him back into Hauser] Relax, Quaid. You'll like being Hauser. Douglas Quaid: The guy's a fucking asshole! Vilos Cohaagen: Not true! He's one of my best friends. B...
Joey Naylor: Mom, why can't I go to California? Jill Naylor: Because, California's just not a safe place. And besides, I'm not sure it's appropriate for your father to bring you on a business trip. Joey Naylor: Appropriate for who? Jill Naylor: What?...
George Fields: OK, I know this is going to disgust you, Michael, but a lot of people are in this business to make money. Michael Dorsey: You make it out like I'm some flake, George. I am in this business to make money, too. George Fields: Really? Mic...
Will Munny: Who's the fellow owns this shithole? [pause] Will Munny: You, fat man. Speak up. Skinny Dubois: Uh, I... I own this establishment. I bought the place from Greeley for a thousand dollars. [Will levels the shotgun, and speaks to someone sta...
Ness: I'm going to see you burn, you son of a bitch, because you killed my friend! Frank Nitti: He died like a pig. Ness: What did you say? Frank Nitti: I said your friend died screaming like a stuck Irish pig. Now you think about that when I beat th...
Dutch Engstrom: [impressed] Well, I'd say those fellas know how to handle themselves! Sykes: They been fightin' Apaches for a thousand years; That's a sure way to learn. Pike Bishop: They ever get armed, with good leaders, this whole country'll go up...
Oompa Loompas: Oompa Loompa doo-pa-dee do / I've got another puzzle for you / Oompa Loompa doo-pa-dah dee / If you are wise you'll listen to me / What do you get from a glut of TV? / A pain in the neck and an IQ of 3 / Why don't you try simply readin...
Withnail: [on the way to the cottage] At some point or another I want to stop and get hold of a child. Marwood: What do you want a child for? Withnail: To tutor it in the ways of righteousness, and procure some uncontaminated urine. [holding up a Fai...
Captain of the Winkie Guard: [after the Wicked Witch has melted] She's... She's dead. You killed her. Dorothy: I didn't mean to kill her. Really, I didn't. It's just that he was on fire. Captain of the Winkie Guard: Hail to Dorothy! The Wicked Witch ...
Wreck-It Ralph: What's going on in this candy-coated heart of darkness? Sour Bill: Nothing... Wreck-It Ralph: Talk! Sour Bill: No! Wreck-It Ralph: I'll lick you. Sour Bill: You wouldn't. Wreck-It Ralph: Oh, yeah? [licks Bill] Sour Bill: Ugh! That's l...
Tony: You're not thinking I'm someone else? Maria: I know you are not. Tony: Or that we've met before? Maria: I know we have not. Tony: I felt, I knew something never before was going to happen, had to happen. But this is so much more. Maria: My hand...
Carl Fox: He's using you, kid. He's got your prick in his back pocket, but you're too blind to see it. Bud Fox: No. What I see is a jealous old machinist who can't stand the fact that his son has become more successful than he has! Carl Fox: What you...
Jon Osterman: Will you smile? If I admit I was wrong? Laurie Juspeczyk: About what? Jon Osterman: Miracles. Events with astronomical odds of occurring, like oxygen turning into gold. I've longed to witness such an event, and yet I neglect that in hum...
Pyro: So, they say you're the bad guy. Magneto: Is that what they say? Pyro: That's a dorky looking helmet. What's it for? Magneto: This "dorky looking helmet" is the only thing that's going to protect me from the REAL bad guys. [magnetically takes P...
[last lines] Charlie Kaufman: I have to go right home. I know how to finish the script now. It ends with Kaufman driving home after his lunch with Amelia, thinking he knows how to finish the script. Shit, that's voice-over. McKee would not approve. H...
Jesse James: [indicating Frank] My brother and me are hardly on speaking terms these days. Robert Ford: I wasn't going to mention it. Jesse James: [pulls two snakes out of a box, startling Bob] You scared? Robert Ford: Just surprised a little. Jesse ...
[first lines] Paul Hackett: [Paul and Lloyd in front of a computer terminal] Alright, punch. Punch it in. Lloyd: Right. Paul Hackett: Okay, let's, first of all, refresh the screen here. Alright, and go into "format ruler". [Lloyd punches at the keybo...
[Nick Fury goes over to the fatally-wounded Coulson] Agent Phil Coulson: I'm sorry, boss. The god rabbited. Nick Fury: Just stay awake. Eyes on me. Agent Phil Coulson: No. I'm clocked out here. Nick Fury: Not an option. Agent Phil Coulson: It's okay,...
[On Derek's change in prison] Danny Vinyard: I'm sorry, Derek. I'm sorry that happened to you. Derek Vinyard: I'm not. I'm lucky. I feel lucky because it's wrong, Danny. It's wrong and it was eating me up, it was going to kill me. And I kept asking m...
[1885 - Marty walks into a saloon, dressed in the outfit that Doc Brown gave him in 1955] Saloon Old-Timer #1: Take a look and see what just breezed in the door. Saloon Old-Timer #2: Why, I didn't know the circus was in town. Saloon Old Timer #3: Mus...
[Marty and Doc are asking how fast the train could go] Marty McFly: Do you think it's possible to get it up to... 90? Engineer: Ha! 90? Tarnation, son, who'd ever need to be in such a hurry? Doc: Well, it's just a little bet he and I have, that's all...
