Dr. Lull: [after Quaid goes crazy at Rekall] Listen to me, he's been going on and on about Mars. He's really been there. Bob McClane: Use your head, you dumb bitch! He's just acting out the secret agent portion of his Ego Trip. Dr. Lull: I'm afraid t...
Douglas Quaid: What do you want? Dr. Edgemar: This is going to be very difficult for you at accept, Mr. Quaid. Douglas Quaid: I'm listening. Dr. Edgemar: I'm afraid you're not really standing here right now. Douglas Quaid: You know, Doc, you could ha...
Toby: Did you know that the Lord of the Rings is gay? Bree Osbourne: I beg your pardon. Toby: There's this big, black tower, right? And it points right at this huge burning vagina thing, and it's like the symbol of ultimate evil. And then Sam and Fro...
Joey Naylor: Why are you hiding from everyone? Nick Naylor: It has something to do with being generally hated right now. Joey Naylor: But it's your job to be generally hated. Nick Naylor: It's more complicated then that, Joey. Joey Naylor: You're jus...
[Jack and Fabrizio are playing poker in a bar in front of the port] Jack: All right, the moment of truth. Somebody's life is about to change. Fabrizio? Niente. Fabrizio: Niente. Jack: Olaf? Nothing. Sven? Oh... two pairs. I'm sorry, Fabrizio. Fabrizi...
Russell: [after Muntz takes Kevin] You gave away Kevin. You just... gave her away Carl Fredricksen: This is none of my concern. I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY OF THIS. Dug: Master, it's alright. Carl Fredricksen: I AM NOT YOUR MASTER! AND YOU DIDN'T SHOW UP, N...
Deke Thornton: [addressing his posse] You think Pike and old Sykes haven't been watchin' us. They know what this is all about - and what do I have? Nothin' but you egg-suckin', chicken stealing gutter trash with not even sixty rounds between you. We'...
Owen: I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave! Duncan: What? Owen: Yeah. You're going to have to take off. We're getting complaints. You're having way too much fun. It's making everyone uncomfortable. Duncan: Okay. [he gets up to leave] Owen: H...
Mrs. Teevee: [as the Wonkatania starts to move] I think I'm going to be seasick! Willy Wonka: [handing something to Mrs. Teevee] Here, take these. Mrs. Teevee: What are they? Willy Wonka: Rainbow drops. Suck them and you can spit in seven different c...
Stanley Kael, Second Newscaster: Four down, one to go, and somewhere out there a lucky person is moving closer and closer to the most sought after prize in history. Though we cannot help but envy whoever he is, and we may feel bitter, but we must rem...
Willy Wonka: [In the Wonkavator] Faster, faster; if we don't pick up enough speed, we'll never get through! Charlie Bucket: Get through what? Willy Wonka: Aha! Grandpa Joe: You mean we're going...? Willy Wonka: Up and out! Grandpa Joe: But this roof ...
Marwood: Right, now we're going to have to approach this scientifically. First thing we've got to do is get this fire alight, then we split into two fact-finding groups. I'll deal with the water and other plumbings, you can check the fuel and wood si...
Guy Forsyth: Did you ever have a job that you hated and worked real hard at? A long, hard day of work. Finally you get to go home, get in bed, close your eyes and immediately you wake up and realize... that the whole day at work had been a dream. It'...
Cowardly Lion: I'll get you anyway, Pee-wee. [Chases Toto; Dorothy hits him on the nose] Dorothy: Shame on you! Cowardly Lion: [Sobbing] Why did you do that for? I didn't bite him. Dorothy: No, but you tried to. It's bad enough picking on a straw man...
[first lines] Cleon: It's still on and we're goin'. Cyrus sent an emissary this afternoon to make sure. Now, Cyrus don't want anybody packed and he don't want anybody flexing any muscle. So, I gave him my word that the Warriors would uphold the truce...
[last lines] Porky Pig: All right. M-m-m-ove along now. Th-th-there's nothing left to see here. That's all folks. Mmm, I like the sound of that. Porky Pig: [turns to audience; iris closes in on Porky and "Merry-Go-Round Broke Down" plays on soundtrac...
Jessica Rabbit: Well, we're not going anywhere in my car. Let's take yours. Eddie Valiant: I have a feeling someone already did. Jessica Rabbit: From the looks of it I'd say it was Roger. My honey bunny was never very good behind the wheel. Eddie Val...
Sally Albright: The first date back is always the toughest, Harry. Harry Burns: You only had one date. How do you know it's not going to get worse? Sally Albright: How much worse can it get than finishing dinner, having him reach over, pull a hair ou...
Harry Burns: We're talking dream date compared to my horror. It started out fine, she's a very nice person, and we're sitting and we're talking at this Ethiopian restaurant that she wanted to go to. And I was making jokes, you know like, "Hey I didn'...
[BlueStar stock has gone from 19 to 22 7/8 very quickly] Marv: Whew! Stock's going to Pluto, man. Bud Fox: Start unloading! Marv: What? SELL? Bud Fox: Dump it! Dump it all! Where's Lou? Marv: He's over there. [Marv gets on the phone] Marv: Ken, this ...
Rorschach: I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in threatening world. Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pic...
