I was not very strong growing up, and my uncle used to look at me, like, 'This kid is not growing up, he is growing tall but he can be broken like a banana.' The banana in Congo is called 'Dikembe.' So my uncle start calling me, 'Dikembe, Dikembe, lo...
I don't gamble anymore since I had a kid. I have fun in Vegas. I see shows, Cirque du Soleil. Don Rickles was in town last time I was there. I'll have lunch with George Wallace. I just look in the Weekly calendar and see who's performing, and inevita...
I am an Air Force brat who grew up at various Air Force bases. I changed six schools in about five years and got stability for the first time when I was sent to a boarding school, Rishi Valley. I lived outside of a cantonment-style living and was amo...
When I travel with my kids abroad, I am not myself, but I'm more a father who wants to protect them. Sometimes, I am even aggressive about certain things and get surprised seeing myself like that: for instance, when people want to take pictures of th...
[after saving Sheeta from the robot, the Dola Gang are flying off. Sheeta is crying against Pazu's shoulder] Louis: Sheeta, you okay? Charles: If I did something wrong, I'd really like to apologize for it, Sheeta. Dola: We *all* did something wrong, ...
[after Clark fails at lighting all the exterior Christmas lights at the "lighting ceremony" in front of the entire family] Frances: Talk about pissing your money away. I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was. Audrey: He worked re...
John Murdoch: Hey, do you know the way to Shell Beach? Taxi Driver: You're kidding! Me and the Mrs. spent our honeymoon there. All you gotta do is take Main Street West to... or is it the Cross... You know, that's funny, I can't remember if it's Main...
Frank Costello: Who let this IRA motherfucker in my bar? [the man looks startled] Frank Costello: [laughs] Only kidding. How's your mother? Man in Costello's Bar: Oh... I'm afraid she's on her way out. Frank Costello: [walks away] We all are. Act acc...
Galloway: Why do you hate them so much? Lt. Weinberg: They beat up on a weakling; that's all they did. The rest is just smokefilled coffee-house crap. They tortured and tormented a weaker kid. They didn't like him. So, they killed him. And why? Becau...
Jep Gambardella: To this question, as kids, my friends always gave the same answer: "Pussy". Whereas I answered "The smell of old people's houses". The question was "What do you really like the most in life?" I was destined for sensibility. I was des...
Karen: One night, Bobby Vinton sent us champagne. There was nothing like it. I didn't think there was anything strange in any of this. You know, a twenty-one-year-old kid with such connections. He was an exciting guy. He was really nice. He introduce...
Ron Weasley: [about Hermione's copy of "The Tales Of Beedle The Bard"] Mum used to read those to me as a kid! "The Wizard and the Hopping Pot," "Babbity Rabbity And Her Cackling Stump"... [Harry and Hermione both look lost] Ron Weasley: Come on! Babi...
Kevin McCallister: Mom, Uncle Frank won't let me watch the movie, but the big kids can. Why can't I? Kate McCallister: Kevin, I'm on the phone. Kevin McCallister: It's not even rated R. He's just being a jerk. Kate McCallister: Kevin, if Uncle Frank ...
Dean McCoppin: Sorry about the crowbar, kid. You'd be surprised how many people want to steal scrap. But, man, once I make it into art, I can't give it away. I mean, what am I? A junkman who makes art or an artist who sells junk? You tell me.
Young Simba: I'm so hungry I could eat a whole zebra. Timon: Ah-ha, we're fresh out of zebra. Young Simba: Any antelope? Timon: Nah-ah. Young Simba: Hippo? Timon: Nope. Listen kid: if you live with us, you're gonna have to eat like us.
1st Stansfield man: He was a pro, he was fast, he fucking came out of nowhere. [Boom] 1st Stansfield man: shoots the chinamen dead in two seconds Malky: Easy man I am a cop 1st Stansfield man: Then turns around and says something to Malky like Léon:...
Grandpa: [to Dwayne] Fuck a lotta women, kid, I have no reason to lie to you. Not just one, a lotta women. Richard: Okay, dad, I think we get it. Grandpa: [to Dwayne] Are you getting it? Is it going in anywhere? No, don't show me the pad. I don't wan...
[last lines] Henry: I want to go home. Mr. Goodkat: Neither of us is going home for a long time, kid. [Goodkat turns on the car radio] Mr. Goodkat: My name is Goodkat. You can call me Mr. Goodkat. [a song called 'Kansas City Shuffle' begins to play o...
Henry J. Waternoose: No, no, no, no, no. What was that? You're trying to scare the kid, not lull it to sleep. Bile: I was going for a snake-slash-ninja approach, with a little hissing. [hisses] Henry J. Waternoose: How many times must I tell you? It'...
[last lines] Carol Lipton: You were jealous of Ted. Larry Lipton: Ted, you've gotta be kidding, take away his elevator shoes and his fake suntan and his capped teeth and what do you have? Carol Lipton: You! Larry Lipton: Right, I like that!
Elise: [crying] I'm so horrible! Nemo Nobody adult: No you're not. You're not horrible. Elise: I can't stand this life anymore! Nemo Nobody adult: What's the matter? You've got the most incredible kids... Elise: Don't try to make me feel better, it o...
