My facial expression must have looked like a swarm of bees as I drank the hot brown liquid. Whatever it was, it was not the sting of coffee I swigged with swagger. Bitter is better than what I tasted.
When I go house hunting, I use a rather large gun. You should see me fish for the best tasting Starbucks coffee. Oh, and can I borrow your plunger?
I asked for the time, and she sold me a way to divide my attention into 12 equal parts. I asked her out to coffee, but she hinted there wasn’t a watch big enough to fit time with me in.
A car is a couch with wheels. My windshield wipers don’t work, so I’ve decided to stop watering my living room carpet. Honk if you want coffee, and I’ll pour you an umbrellaful.
Alice goes into the kitchen and returns with a cup of coffee for me, which she announces is free-range and fair-trade and shade-farmed in Malawi, and I nod along as if my coffee needs go beyond hot and caffeinated.
We rode on the horse like we were in love and drunk on coffee. But that’s silly, because we weren’t drunk and in love. We were just drunk, and not from the coffee either.
I love Blue Ribbon coffee, and she loves Red Ribbon coffee. I don’t love her, because how could I love someone who loves losers?
Our relationship is getting serious. I now know she likes Karaoke. Next she’ll tell me she loves coffee. And then she’ll say she loves me—but not as much as she loves coffee.
Looks like I missed a party. Good. I wasn’t really in the mood to off demons this evening. Haven’t had my coffee yet. (Jared) You drink coffee? (Stryker) No, but it was my pathetic attempt at humor. (Jared)
I’ll tug at your breasts like a thirsty child. Try not to burn your nipples in my hot coffee. While you’re at it, I also like sugar in my coffee.
I would offer to meet up for some coffee, but I don’t drink coffee. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to burden you with my personal problems. It’s just that I haven’t been the same since the Folgers fiasco of ‘04.
Everyone thinks I have a coffee plantation in Sierra Leone, but I have a cashew crop project. I wrote about a woman who owns a coffee plantation! When you are talking about a woman writer coming from a hot country, there's a complete assumption that ...
Tommy DeVito: What the fuck you looking at? Come on. Make that coffee to go. Let's go. [Frankie mumbles something and goes to the door with the coffee pot in his hand] Tommy DeVito: What the fuck are you doing? It's a joke! A joke! Put the fucking po...
Skylar: Maybe we could go out for coffee sometime? Will: Great, or maybe we could get together and just eat a bunch of caramels. Skylar: What? Will: When you think about it, it's just as arbitrary as drinking coffee. Skylar: [laughs] Okay, sounds goo...
Major John Smith: Nobody leaves here until I come back. Jock, save me some coffee. Sgt. Jock MacPherson: It'll be cold by then. Major John Smith: I'd say that's an advantage. You can't taste cold coffee.
Rebecca: [serving a woman a coffee] Can I get you a bis... Rude Coffee Customer: [curtly] No, I do not want a biscotti with that. [she takes her coffee and leaves] Enid: God! How can you stand all these assholes? Rebecca: Some people are OK, but most...
When I saw a murder taking place, I almost didn’t have time to make coffee before stopping it. But thank God I did, because otherwise somebody would have died—and even worse, I’d be tired.
I travel by foot. It’s like a wheelchair in a microwave it’s so easy to camel. I sleep on a pillow made of coffee, and I’d ask you to turn out the light when you’re done torturing your albino captive.
Coffee has a way of waking me up like no alarm clock can. Not only do I sleepwalk, but I sleepdrink, and I often don’t wake up until 5:00 PM, when I leave work.
When you meet me, the first thing you’ll notice is I have a firm handshake. The second thing you’ll notice is that I’m wearing oven mitts. I like my introductions hot, like my iced coffee.
He walked by, saw me and her standing there, and he said, “You’re such a pretty lady.” I said, “Thanks, man, I appreciate you noticing me.” I was upset when he didn’t offer to buy me coffee.
