In a brave and noble way, I want to sacrifice my life one day so that two of my clones can live.
I'm a competitor, and I welcome competition. My ideal matchup would be the best versus the best, or more concretely, me versus my clone. I don't know if he'd beat me or if I'd beat him, but I could guarantee that no matter who wins, I'd win.
Being sociable is a skill you can learn. It’s like throwing a spiral, riding a bicycle, or murdering your clone’s lover, who also happens to be your girlfriend.
I have assigned myself a Hooray Factor of five. This is the top level, and is the only level that has a physical representation—that of a high five. But don’t try to give me a high five, because I’m the only person in the world with a Hooray Fa...
I made myself an “I Love Jennifer” jacket out of my old “I Love Jenn” jacket. Two girls, one continuous love. The I Love Jennifer is a little off-center, but then so am I. Better than being self-centered, as my clone would probably say.
Know yourself better than your opponent knows you, know your opponent better than he knows himself, know yourself better than you know your opponent, and know you have all this knowledge and you will be victorious. That’s the advice I’ll give my ...
Most people have a list of 100 books to read before they die, or 100 places to visit. Not me. I have a list of 100 birthdays to see. No need to write them down, they're simply 50 through 150. Another list of mine is 100 people to meet before I die wh...
Don’t be jealous if I spend 50% of my time with you, and 50% of my time with others, because you get 100% of 50%, while all the others have to share that other 50%.” This is the speech I’ve prepared to tell my wife in the future, when I’m spe...
At my last birthday party I had fun and really let myself go. Literally. I opened the cages where I keep my clones and I let myself go, all 333 versions of myself.
This may be impossible for you to believe," Colt said in a hushed voice, "but as recently as last year, I was a hyper, naive-albeit extremely good-looking-minor myself." "And now you're a persistent, outdoorsy, unshaven man-boy who cavorts with clone...
I had a dream about you. You loved me, and I loved you. We had an amazing life until you realized that I also loved your clone. You were jealous, and I didn’t see the problem—I was in love with you, even if it wasn’t you. Plus, I was in love wi...
Bespoke tailoring: yes! I found this one pair of pants - they're Canali - and brought them into a tailor and said, 'Clone these, dammit.' They just do all the right things. I've got eight pairs in different colors and I never have to think about pant...
In a depression, I’d imagine rich people try to dress like they’re poor, and poor people try to dress like they’re rich. As for me, I try to dress exactly like my clone would.
Having a clone to bounce ideas off of would be a way to generate more ideas. Another way would be to build an idea generator that plugs into a wall socket and works only when the power has gone out.
My name is Sam (my name is Am), and I am my own fan. I’m a clone of Jarod Kintz, and he supports my message.
I believe the love shared between two people shouldn’t be secretly shared with a third. Not even if I am vacationing on the moon, and that third person is my clone.
I killed my clone and I hid his body behind every mirror I’ll ever step in front of. I’m always surprised to see him, and I never fail to brush his teeth or gaze at his decomposing body.
He’ll think I’ll do it, he’ll act like I’ll do it, and so I will do it. But if he will think differently, maybe I will act differently. But I know me, I know him, he knows himself, he knows me, and he is my clone, so we will each act exactly ...
If artists often get famous posthumously, then there is only one thing for me to do—fake my own death. Or I could just wait for science to give me a clone, and kill him instead. He’ll get my credit, and I’ll get his money.
If I own a business, I work for myself. And if I have no revenue, I work for free. That’s not slavery. That’ll be the case when I employ 1,000,000,000 clones of myself. I won’t pay them, but they are me, so it’s not slavery.
If you expect others to think for you, then you expect others to live your life for you. And I’m sorry, but the only person I’ll let live my life for me is my clone. He thinks like me, so I’m OK with him thinking for me.
