Over the years, we worked on some promising projects that Hunter could do while never leaving the Farm. One was The Gonzo Book of Etiquette, a radical updating of Emily Post that would instruct modern people on such niceties as how to tell your paren...
A dog has no use for fancy cars or big homes or designer clothes. Status symbol means nothing to him. A waterlogged stick will do just fine. A dog judges others not by their color or creed or class but by who they are inside. A dog doesn't care if yo...
We have a bad habit of seeing books as sort of cheaply made movies where the words do nothing but create visual narratives in our heads. So too often what passes for literary criticism is "I couldn't picture that guy", or "I liked that part", or "thi...
Otto Meyer: [Honking car as it pulls into the Ray & Irwin Garage] Fellas. I'm glad you're here. Look, I need your help. Here's what happened. I had this blowout. I think there's a spare in the back. It may be a little flat. Take a look at it will you...
Melville Crump: The man said there was a certain amount of money buried down in this park. Lennie Pike: That's right. It was under a big W. Say what is a big W? Ding Bell: If we find out, we'll send you a wire. Melville Crump: It's only a possibility...
Vincent: Look in the mirror. Paper towels, clean cab. Limo company some day. How much you got saved? Max: That ain't any of your business. Vincent: Someday? Someday my dream will come? One night you will wake up and discover it never happened. It's a...
Daisy Werthan: You should have let me keep my old LaSalle. It never would've behaved this way and you know it. Boolie Werthan: Mama, cars don't behave. They are behaved upon. Fact is, you demolished that Chrysler all by yourself. Daisy Werthan: Say w...
Grace: What? What is it? Tom: A man can't really be blamed for being scared, now can he? Grace: No. Tom: No. I was scared, Grace. I used you and I am sorry. I'm stupid, I am, maybe even arrogant sometimes. Grace: You are, Tom. Tom: Although using peo...
Brian Clough: What are you doing? You weren't supposed to *accept* our resignations! Sam Longson: Shouldn't bloody well offer them, then, should you? Brian Clough: Look, you can't get rid of us. It would be a disaster for the club. For the whole of D...
Tyler Durden: Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us cha...
Dr. Gonzo: Sounds like big trouble. You're going to need plenty of legal advice before this thing is over. As your attorney, I advise you to rent a very fast car with no top. And you'll need the cocaine. Tape recorder for special music. Acapulco shir...
[Zero has just shown M. Gustave the newspaper article announcing Mme. Celine's death] M. Gustave: Dear God! Zero: I'm terribly sorry, sir. M. Gustave: We must go to her. Zero: We must? M. Gustave: Tout de suite. She needs me, and I need you, to help ...
Dr. Peter Venkman: [looking at the temporary sign on Ghostbusters HQ while a worker is hanging it up] You don't think it's too subtle, Marty, you don't think people are going to drive down and not see the sign? [hears a siren approaching and an old, ...
Chunk: Listen, okay? You guys'll never believe me. There was two cop cars, okay? And they were chasing this four-wheel deal, this real neat ORV, and there were bullets flying all over the place. It was the most amazing thing I ever saw! Mikey: More a...
[first lines] Heather: So even if Columbus got lost and wasn't the first to discover America, he's still my hero. He was really brave to sail in such a tiny ship over a really big ocean. And because of him, we get Columbus Day off of school. Teacher:...
Bobby Jordan: Give me that. Bobby's Buddy: [passing Bobby a liquor bottle, then spotting Jack and Judy smoking a joint together] Hey, isn't that, that Stall faggot? Bobby Jordan: Yeah. Bobby's Buddy: You should go kick his ass. Bobby Jordan: I'm goin...
Barry the Baptist: [answering his phone] What? Dean: I thought you said there'd be no staff Barry! Barry the Baptist: Did you get those guns? Dean: You wanna see what they did to poor Gary? [calling out to a delirious Gary] Dean: Gary? Gary? Barry th...
Mr. Eddy: How you doin' Pete? Pete Dayton: Okay. Mr. Eddy: I'm sure you noticed that girl that was with me the other day, good lookin' blonde? She stayed in the car? Her name is Alice. I swear I love that girl to death. If I ever find out that somebo...
Humbert Humbert: Well, it's nothing, but... she had an accident. Clare Quilty: Oh gee, she had an accident? That's really terrible, I mean, fancy a fellow's wife having... a normal guy having... his wife having an accident like that. W-what happened ...
Yuri Orlov: Of all the weapons in the vast soviet arsenal, nothing was more profitable than Avtomat Kalashnikova model of 1947. More commonly known as the AK-47, or Kalashnikov. It's the world's most popular assault rifle. A weapon all fighters love....
Kate Grant: [looking at graves] There's Woody's little sister, Rose. She was only nineteen when she was killed in a car wreck near Wausa. What a whore! David Grant: Mom! Kate Grant: Nah, I liked Rose, but my God, she was a slut. David Grant: C'mon......