Quotes of: Carlin Keyword

No one is more important to the future of our state than our teachers.

Mike Huckabee

Entrepreneurs don't believe the future is predictable - but they do believe that they can create the future themselves.

Max McKeown

What kind of town do we want in the future, and how are we going to plan on that?

Peter Berg

The future comes quickly. Before you know it, you turn around and it's tomorrow.

Pia Zadora

You know, I don't know what the future will bring, but I'm ready for whatever comes!

Sissy Spacek

Comedians, we're just people who whine. But we happen to be funny when we whine.

Artie Lange

My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn't be funny, but to observe it, it's hilarious.

Bill Burr

Don't remember me as too nice or beautiful or funny, because then you'll be disappointed.

Celia Johnson

To all the girls out there who think being funny is not sexy, you are wrong!

Chad Michael Murray

I'm just an entertainer. All I want to be is funny. I never aspired to play Hamlet.

Danny Kaye

I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming.

Demetri Martin

I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.

Demetri Martin

Children are the most honest critics. They will say 'You're funny', but also 'You're pathetic - go away.'

Dylan Moran

The funny thing is that I had never actually watched TV.

Dave Willis

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Groucho Marx

Funny, how moms can tell you what to do no matter how old or big you are.

Gabrielle Reece

Lots of models have played mermaids throughout history and it is, kind of, a funny rite of passage.

Gemma Ward

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

Henny Youngman

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.

Johnny Carson

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.

Jimmy Durante

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver.

Jay Leno