Quotes of: Carlin Keyword

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.

Rodney Dangerfield

One longs to be funny, to make people laugh. Laughter is such a sign of approval, isn't it?

Tom Baker

When you're small, you either are funny, or you get beat up a lot.

Tim Conway

There are just so many funny kids and teenagers. They're just not aware of how funny they are.

Vanessa Bayer

A running theme in my life is my inability to say no to anything.

David Pogue

I want to resume the life of a shy person.

Garrison Keillor

It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars.

Garrison Keillor

One of my friends went on a murder weekend... now he is doing life for it.

Jack Dee

It was the roughest time in my life. Connie helped me through it.

Maury Povich

I've been living a lie all my life.

Michael Reagan

Well, I've been a fan of videogames all my life.

Michael Strahan

Players suffer coaching changes all the time; it's life in the NFL.

Michael Wilbon

In life, comedy occurs naturally, as it should, in the most appalling of circumstances.

Peter Baynham

Formula One has been the backdrop of my life.

Tamara Ecclestone

I've had two pedicures in my life, and they were glorious.

Willie Geist

Broadway is a main artery of New York life - the hardened artery.

Walter Winchell

I'd love to interview Mick Jagger, but that might be scary.

Alexa Chung

I still love radio, but TV is also an awesome platform.

Eddie Trunk

I just like working with smart people.

Edward Norton

I read a lot of nonfiction - especially books about the brain.

Ellen Pompeo

I majored in political communications, so I intended to be a diplomat.

Edgar Ramirez