Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: [on the ship's intercom] This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode.
Inara Serra: I'm fine! I'm... giddy. Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Ya know, for a woman schooled in telling men what they want to hear, you ain't much of a liar.
Dr. Simon Tam: [referring to River] One simple job. She'll be fine. Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: She is fine! Except for still being crazy! She's the picture of health.
Capt. James 'Bugger' Staros: I've lived with these men, sir, for two and a half years and I will not order them all to their deaths.
I would like it to be known that I have decided not to marry Group Capt. Peter Townsend. Mindful of the church's teaching that Christian marriage is indissoluble, and conscious of my duty to the Commonwealth, I have resolved to put these consideratio...
Otto Meyer: I wish I knew what they're going to do to us. But no matter what happens to us... [to Captain Culpeper] Otto Meyer: what happens to you, I hope will be worse! Capt. T.G. Culpeper: I don't think you have to worry too much about that. My wi...
[Guran is coming in to bat] British Team Member: Coming from the jungle? [men laughing] British Team Member 2: Make way! [men laughing] British Team Member: Don't get too close, Smithy! [men laughing] British Team Member 2: What on Earth is he doing?...
[Terrell and Chekov have beamed down into a sandstorm] Capt. Terrell: Chekov, are you *sure* these are the correct coordinates? Chekov: Captain, this is the garden spot of Ceti Alpha Six!
Calamy, Midshipman: [while viewing construction of the decoy Surprise] Excuse me, sir, but what are they building? Capt. Jack Aubrey: Your first command.
Capt. Jack Aubrey: England is under threat of invasion, and though we be on the far side of the world, this ship is our home. This ship *is* England.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Doctor, I'm takin' your sister under my protection here. If anything happens to her, anything at all, I swear to you, I will get very choked up. Honestly, there could be tears.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: [to Inara] But you fog things up! You always have. You spin me about. I wish like hell you were elsewhere. Inara Serra: [sighs] I was.
Trade Agent: You all are Browncoats, eh? Fought for independence? Petty thieving ain't exactly soldiers' work. Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: War's long done. We're all just folk now.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: They take you down, I don't expect to grieve overmuch. Like to kill you myself, I see you again. The Operative: You won't... [small, grim smile] The Operative: There is nothing left to see.
Shepherd Book: [dying] I killed the ship that killed us. Not very Christian. Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: You did what was right. Shepherd Book: Coming from you that means - almost nothing. [grin]
Capt. James 'Bugger' Staros: You are my sons, my dear sons. You live inside me now. I'll carry you wherever I go.
Capt. Harrison Byers: [during a tour of spacious judges' quarters] I trust you'll be comfortable in this room, sir. Judge Dan Haywood: Captain, I have no doubt that the entire state of Maine would be comfortable in this room!
Capt. Stuart Kinder: [while the dozen are cavorting with the prostitutes in the guards' barracks] I wonder if any of them even know it's Mother's Day. Major John Reisman: [glances at Kinder and pauses briefly] is it?
[Szpilman is discovered by the Polish army, wearing the German dress coat given him by Capt. Hosenfeld] Wladyslaw Szpilman: No. Please. I'm Polish. I'm not a German. Polish Soldier: Then why the fucking coat? Wladyslaw Szpilman: I'm cold.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Is it that bad, sir? General Jack D. Ripper: Looks like it's pretty hairy.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: What in the hell happened back there? Hoban 'Wash' Washburn: Start with the part where Jayne gets knocked out by a 90-pound girl 'cause... I don't think that's ever getting old.
