Peter Gibbons: [discussing the possibility of going to prison] This isn't Riyadh. You know they're not gonna saw your hands off here, alright? The worst they would ever do is they would put you for a couple of months into a white-collar, minimum-secu...
Charles Van Doren: Last week alone, I had 11 proposals of marriage! Mark Van Doren: Perhaps you should accept one of them. Dorothy Van Doren: [to Mark] And to think, they unleash you on those impressionable young minds. Mark Van Doren: Well, why not?...
[Goodspeed's Beatles album arrives at the office] Stanley Goodspeed: Yes! She's here, bring it to me now, thank you Phil! Isherwood: What's that? And why did you have it sent here? Stanley Goodspeed: Carla wouldn't approve. She thinks it's dumb to sp...
Geneva man: [a Red Cross official is inspecting the camp just after Sefton was beaten on suspicion being an enemy informant. The official sees his injuries] What happened to you? Were you beaten? [Sefton doesn't answer] Geneva man: Why don't you answ...
Sulu: Attention: John Harrison. This is Captain Hikaru Sulu of the USS Enterprise. A shuttle of highly trained officers is on its way to your location. If you do not surrender to them immediately, I will unleash the entire payload of advanced long-ra...
Eddie Valiant: Anybody know you're here? Roger Rabbit: Nobody. Not a soul, except, uh... Eddie Valiant: Who? Roger Rabbit: Well, you see, I didn't know where your office was. So I asked the newsboy. He didn't know. So I asked the fireman, the green g...
Lieutenant Schrank: [as they exit] Say goodbye to the nice boys, Krupke. Officer Krupke: Goodbye, boys. Snowboy: [mimicking Krupke] "Goodbye, boys." Action: [mimicking Shranke] "You hoodlums don't own the streets." Snowboy: "Go play in the park!" Act...
Bud Fox: Hi, Marv. Marv: [sarcastically] Oh, hi. Say, why don't YOU get the hell out of MY office! Bud Fox: I know I've been a bit of a schmuck lately and I just want to apologize. Marv: You've been a *real* schmuck lately. So go thou and sin no more...
[Asking for background information about Howard Hunt] Bob Woodward: It's just profile information, mostly. We know, for example, that he works for Mullen and Company, or did work for Mullen and Company, as a writer. He's also a novelist; we know that...
Sister Mary Stigmata: [after chasing Jake and Elwood out of her office with a ruler for using foul language] You are such a disappointing pair. I prayed so hard for you. It saddens and hurts me that the two young men whom I raised to believe in the T...
Jesus Quintana: What's this day of rest shit? What's this bullshit? I don't fuckin' care! It don't matter to Jesus. But you're not foolin' me, man. You might fool the fucks in the league office, but you don't fool Jesus. This bush league psyche-out s...
Read this to yourself. Read it silently. Don't move your lips. Don't make a sound. Listen to yourself. Listen without hearing anything. What a wonderfully weird thing, huh? NOW MAKE THIS PART LOUD! SCREAM IT IN YOUR MIND! DROWN EVERYTHING OUT. Now, h...
Imagine that you are stuck on a long train ride and must choose one of two books to read in order to pass the time: the first is a novel whose main character is an office worker who is essentially working to pay his monthly cable bill; the second is ...
I have tutored Little Igor to be a man of this world. For example, I exhibited him a smutty magazine three days yore, so that he should be appraised of the many positions in which I am carnal. 'This is sixty-nine,' I told him, presenting the magazine...
But I've always been a sucker for externals alone: the shape, the shine, what the surface suggests to my palm. So mechanically disinclined it's verging on criminal, I never understood the beauty of an object's workings until Linny sat my reluctant se...
That's because true travel, the kind with no predetermined end, is one of the most selfish endeavors we can possibly undertake-an act in which we focus solely on our own fulfillment, with little regard to those we leave behind. After all, we're the o...
Elliot - Elliot waved absently, making a decision right then and there. He'd take the trip that Patrick offered. A cruise down Europe's most famous rivers couldn't be any more disruptive than home, after all. Alice -I stood up shaking the laptop at n...
You can't tell that the coffin holds the body of a boy. He wasn't even sixteen but his coffin's the same size as a man's would be. It's not just that he was young, but because it was so sudden. No one should die the way he did; that's what the faces ...
I guess I was always looking for something. What it was, I didn’t know. I wanted help from the VA, but didn’t want to go back, didn’t want to be subjected to that second-rate treatment any longer. I wanted to find peace within myself, but didn�...
There’s nothing like that feeling of waiting for a guy. It’s the loneliest feeling in the world. Holding that cell phone in your hand as you take out the trash, use the bathroom, change the litter box. Fearful that the one second you aren’t loo...
Neither spoke, but lat silently listening to the ticking of the clock. A stair creaked, and a squeaky mouse scurried noisily through the wall. The darkness was oppressive, and after lying for some time screwing up his courage, he took the box of matc...
