Young Ed Bloom: Your last name is different. You married. Jenny: I was 18, he was 28. Turns out it was a big difference.
Walter Sobchak: That rug really tied the room together, did it not? The Dude: Fuckin' A. Donny: And this guy peed on it. Walter Sobchak: Donny, please.
The Dude: Fuck sympathy! I don't need your fuckin' sympathy, man, I need my fucking johnson! Donny: What do you need that for, Dude?
Maude Lebowski: What do you do for recreation? The Dude: Oh, the usual. I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback.
Walter Sobchak: Lady, I got buddies who died face down in the muck so that you and I could enjoy this family restaurant!
The Dude: [on the phone] Of course the car made it home, you're calling me at home. No, Walter, it did NOT look like Larry was about to crack!
Walter Sobchak: Look at our current situation with that camel fucker over in Iraq. Pacifism is not something to hide behind.
[at the funeral parlor] Walter Sobchak: GOD DAMN IT! Look, just because we're bereaved, that doesn't make us saps!
Walter Sobchak: The man in the black pajamas, Dude. Worthy fuckin' adversary. Donny: Who's in pajamas Walter? Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny.
The Dude: Who the fuck are you, man? Knox Harrington: [giggles] Oh, just a friend of Maudie's. The Dude: Yeah, a friend with a cleft asshole?
Walter Sobchak: That's not her toe, Dude. The Dude: Then whose toe is it, Walter? Walter Sobchak: How the fuck should I know?
Walter Sobchak: [author Arthur Sellars is lying quietly in his iron lung] And a good day to you, sir!
The Dude: This is the fuckin' guy! I can find this fuckin' Lebowski guy! Donny: His name's Lebowski? That's your name, Dude!
Walter Sobchak: Life does not stop and start at your convenience, you miserable piece of shit. Donny: What's wrong with Walter, Dude?
Vivian: You've forgotten one thing - me. Philip Marlowe: What's wrong with you? Vivian: Nothing you can't fix. [last lines]
Vivian: You go too far, Marlowe. Marlowe: Those are harsh words to throw at a man, especially when he's walking out of your bedroom.
Marlowe: You know what he'll do when he comes back? Beat my teeth out, then kick me in the stomach for mumbling.
Norris: Are you attempting to tell me my duties, sir? Philip Marlowe: No, just having fun trying to guess what they are.
Philip Marlowe: You made a mistake. Mrs. Rutledge didn't want to see me. Norris: I'm sorry, sir. I make many mistakes.
Philip Marlowe: [after Carmen had thrown herself at him] You ought to wean her, she's old enough.
Philip Marlowe: Did I hurt you much, sugar? Agnes Lowzier: You and every other man I've ever met.
