I was influenced by a lot of stand-up comedians... Eddie Murphy back when he was doing 'Raw.' I watched that so many times as a kid, I can probably still quote the entire thing to this day. Chris Rock. Dave Chappelle. George Carlin. A lot of the guys...
A common misperception of me is... that I am a tough, rough northerner, which I suppose I am really. But I'm pretty mild-mannered most of the time. It's the parts that you play I guess. I don't mind it. I'm not a tough guy. I'd like to act as a fair,...
The only way the gender divide affected me was the social things the younger guy executives could do with their bosses. I don't know what went on in the clubs, because I didn't go. I made sure my work was stellar, and that compensated for whatever so...
There are as many attitudes to cooking as there are people cooking, of course, but I do think that cooking guys tend - I am a guilty party here - to take, or get, undue credit for domestic virtue, when in truth cooking is the most painless and, in it...
Well, to tell you the straight honest truth, it was like a Grateful Dead cover band. I didn't feel - and nothing against the guys - I didn't feel that they were opening up like they should. I'll tell you what, with guitar players, Steven has what I l...
George Carlin is kind of my template now because George Carlin before was straight laced regular comic and he had short hair, a tie, suit, nightclub guy. Then he said screw it, let his hair grow, just started telling what he thought was the truth. So...
Hannah: I'm here to bang the hot guy who hit on me at the bar. Jacob: Jacob. Hannah: Jacob! Sorry, Jacob... Jacob: Do people still say "bang"? Hannah: I do. And we're gonna bang!
[Spike picks up military jets pursuing him on the Swordfish's radar] Spike: Oh, great. A bored little army. [the jets begin to fire] Spike: Listen, I don't have time to screw around with you guys!
Harry Callahan: You know, you're crazy if you think you've heard the last of this guy. He's gonna kill again. District Attorney Rothko: How do you know? Harry Callahan: 'Cause he likes it.
Barton Keyes: Well, I get darn sick of tryin' to pick up after a gang of fast-talking salesmen dumb enough to sell life insurance to a guy who sleeps in the same bed with four rattlesnakes.
Batman: [about the Joker] Where is he? Salvatore Maroni: I don't know where he is, he found us! Batman: He must have friends! Salvatore Maroni: [incredulous] Friends? Have you *met* this guy?
The Joker: [to Batman] I wanted to see what you'd do. And you didn't disappoint... You let five people die. Then, you let Dent take your place. Even to a guy like me, that's cold...
Edward D. Wood, Jr.: This story's gonna grab people. It's about this guy, he's crazy about this girl, but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn, Georgie. This is drama.
Charlene Fleming: That's the movie you wanted to see? There wasn't even any good sex in it. Had to read the whole fuckin' movie. Fuckin' subtitled. Some guy from a road crew recommended it to you, a fuckin' subtitled movie?
[as the pelicans watch Gerald choking on his breakfast] Nigel: Reckon somebody oughta help the poor guy. Pelicans: [all shrug and mutter] Yeah, yeah right... Nigel: [sarcastically] Well, don't everybody fly off at once.
Carl Showalter: Oh, fuck it, I don't have to talk, either, man! See how you like it. Just total fuckin' silence. Two can play at that game, smart guy. We'll just see how you like it. Total silence.
Simon Bishop: Thank you, Melvin. You... overwhelm me. [pauses] Simon Bishop: I love you. Melvin Udall: I tell you, buddy... I'd be the luckiest guy alive if that did it for me.
Sam: This is your one opportunity to do something that no one has ever done before and that no one will copy throughout human existence. And if nothing else, you will be remembered as the one guy who ever did this. This one thing.
Vinny: You know, Louie, there's one good thing about this Ghost Dog guy. Louie: What's that, Vin? Vinny: He's sending us out the old way. Like real fucking gangsters.
Howl: You didn't have to come back, Calcifer. Calcifer: Yeah, I kinda missed you guys, and it looks like it's gonna rain. Young Sophie: I missed you too, Calcifer.
Sgt. James R. 'Fatso' Judson: Tough monkey. Guys like you end up in the stockade sooner or later. Some day you'll walk in; I'll be waiting. I'll show you a couple of things.
