Linguini: [to Remy] Okay, so let's think this out. You know how to cook, and I know how to... appear human. We just need to work out a system so that I do what you want, in a way that doesn't look like I'm being controlled by a tiny rat chef - oh wil...
Karl: I don't reckon you have to go with women to be a good daddy to a boy. You been real square-dealin' with me. The Bible says two men ought not lay together. But I don't reckon the Good Lord would send anybody like you to Hades. That Frank, he liv...
[after being smacked in the jaw by Jackie Boy] Bozo No. 1: [about Jackie Boy] He is generous. But that temper of his... you shouldn't have picked on him like you did. My temper, you don't have to worry about. Shellie: [grabs a knife and points it at ...
[Dwight has been pulled over by a policeman on a motorcycle, with Jackie-Boy slumped over dead in the passenger seat] Motorcycle Cop: Your buddy there... Partied a little too hard tonight? Dwight: [staring coldly at the cop] I'm the designated driver...
Cmdr. Deanna Troi: [very drunk] Look. He wouldn't even talk to me unless I had a drink with him. And then, it took three shots of something called "tequila" just to find out that HE was the one we're looking for! And I've spent the last twenty minute...
[as they approach Fiona's castle, Donkey smells the air] Donkey: Whoa, Shrek, did you do that? Man, you gotta warn somebody before you crack one like that, my mouth was open and everything! Shrek: Donkey, if that was me, you'd be dead! [sniffs] Shrek...
Captain von Trapp: Maria, there isn't going to be any Baroness anymore. Maria: I don't understand. Captain von Trapp: Well, we called off our engagement, you see, and... Maria: Oh, I'm sorry. Captain von Trapp: Yes. You are? Maria: Mm-hmm. You did? C...
Emily Posa: Do you wanna play a game? Ben Thomas: What game? Emily Posa: The "what if" game. Ben Thomas: The "what if" game. Emily Posa: What if... my pager goes off... and it's a heart... and... it works? And my body doesn't reject it? And... what i...
Fogell: Oh oh, I forgot to tell you: my mom said we could have the TV from the basement... Evan: Shut the fuck up, man. He's gonna hear you. Just be quiet; wait until he goes away. Fogell: You still haven't told him that we're rooming together? Evan:...
Andy Dufresne: I want to know, how the score comes out. Tommy Williams: I'll show you, how the score comes out [crumbles test paper] Tommy Williams: . TWO POINTS! THERE'S YOUR GODDAMN SCORE! Cats crawling on trees, five time five is twenty-five. [sho...
Henry Gondorff: What's your problem? Doyle Lonnegan: I'm putting half a million dollars on Lucky Dan to win, third race at Riverside Park. Henry Gondorff: Can't lay that off in time. A bet like that could break us. [Hooker stares at him incredulously...
[Secundus has just been murdered and has become a ghost, joining his other dead brothers] Secundus: [trying to laugh off his brothers' frosty stares] Oh, please, you're not annoyed at that whole murder thing, are you? I mean, that was ten years ago. ...
Travis Bickle: All the animals come out at night - whores, skunk pussies, buggers, queens, fairies, dopers, junkies, sick, venal. Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets. I go all over. I take people to the Bronx, Brookly...
Kate: I've been good to you, I've taken care of you. If you die, where does that leave me? Doc Holliday: Without a meal ticket I suppose. [Doc rides horse out of barn into stable area, Kate runs out after him punching him in anger] Kate: You bastard!...
Clarence Worley: I can't tell you... that was one of the best times I ever had. It was. But, you know, I knew something must be rotten in Denmark. There was no way you could like me that much. Man, I can't tell you how relieved I was when you took of...
Woody: Hey! Who moved my doodle pad way over here? Rex: [jumps in front of Woody] ROAR! Woody: Hey, how ya doin', Rex. Rex: [stops roaring] Were you scared? Tell me honestly. Woody: I was close to being scared that time. Rex: I'm going for fearsome h...
Bowtie Driver: Me and the bookkeeper are walking out of here, getting into a car, and driving away. Or else he dies! He dies! And you ain't got nothing! You got five seconds to make up your minds! Ness: You got him? George Stone: Yeah, I got him. Bow...
Newsreel Announcer: [after the National Explorer's Society accuses Muntz of fabricating the "Monster of Paradise Falls" skeleton] The organization strips Muntz of his membership. [a patch is ripped off Muntz's jacket] Newsreel Announcer: Humiliated, ...
Deke Thornton: [addressing his posse] You think Pike and old Sykes haven't been watchin' us. They know what this is all about - and what do I have? Nothin' but you egg-suckin', chicken stealing gutter trash with not even sixty rounds between you. We'...
Owen: I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave! Duncan: What? Owen: Yeah. You're going to have to take off. We're getting complaints. You're having way too much fun. It's making everyone uncomfortable. Duncan: Okay. [he gets up to leave] Owen: H...
[first lines] [in German, using English subtitles] Damiel: [voiceover] When the child was a child, it walked with its arms swinging. It wanted the stream to be a river, the river a torrent, and this puddle to be the sea. When the child was a child, i...