I’m willing to die for my beliefs, but over the course of a lifetime and not all at once right now.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksIf a building were shaped like a body, I’d imagine you’d exit out the rear.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI’m very proud of my body of work. You should see it naked sometime.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksAre you smarter than my brain in a jar? Have a pickle while you ponder it.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI have a bedroom rug that I feed. It’s not very flat, and it meows when I step on it.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksMy cat’s favorite chew toy is a pen. I’d wager that he is a better writer than me.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksA meow’s a sound I want to look at. And after I see it, I want to pet it.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksIt’s not fun to pet cats when you’ve already poured gravy on them, and you’re holding silverware.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI try not to sell myself short, unless I’m giving myself a great price on the stuff.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksWe talked for four hours. Well, I talked for four, and she listened for two.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksA lifestyle of deception is hard to keep up if your clones aren’t willing to participate.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI don’t drink water, because if water can erode rock, think what it can do to flesh.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI have a shirt that’s skin tight. It’s made from human flesh.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI am Cloud “Combat” McCloud. Fear my thunder! Love my chicken tenders.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksThe best part about a rear naked choke, is the naked part.
The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.Somebody tell Uncle Sam the ultimate stimulus package is a bottle of Viagra.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks