Stories don’t teach us to be good; it isn’t as simple as that. They show us what it feels like to be good, or to be bad. They show us people like ourselves doing right things and wrong things, acting bravely or acting meanly, being cruel or being...
Suppose neutral angels were able to talk, Yahweh and Lucifer – God and Satan, to use their popular titles – into settling out of court. What would be the terms of the compromise? Specifically, how would they divide the assets of their early kingd...
If Mom is convinced that ballet lessons are a must, she should take them. Although it may look odd to see a thirty-year old woman hang- ing onto a bar and flinging a slightly plump leg in the air, the sight is not as pathetic as seeing her seven-year...
Dr. King Schultz: Good morning, inn keeper. Two beers for two weary travelers! Innkeeper: [while busy fixing a lamp bulb in the diner] Ah, it's still a bit early. We won't be open for another hour. By then, we'll be servin' breakfast- [the innkeeper ...
Mr. Fox: I spotted a couple of broken burglar bars underneath the back door to Bean's secret cider cellar. Kylie: We're breaking into Bean's *house*? Mr. Fox: Cellar. Kylie: Where he *lives*? Mr. Fox: Where he keeps the cider. Ash: [appears behind th...
Conductor: [stopping Gandhi on the train in South Africa] What are you doing in here, coolie? Gandhi: I reserved this car. I have a ticket. Conductor: How did you get hold of it? Gandhi: I sent for it by post. I am an attorney. European Passenger: An...
Bill: I'm a bouncer in a titty bar, Bill. If she wants to fight me, all she gotta do is come down to the Club, start some shit, and we'll be in a fight. Bill: I know we haven't spoken in some time. And the last time we spoke wasn't the most pleasant....
Colin: Exciting news! Tony: What? Colin: I've bought a ticket to the States. I'm off in three weeks. Tony: No! Colin: Yes! To a fantastic place called Wisconsin. Tony: No! Colin: Yes! Wisconsin babes, here comes Sir Colin! Whoo hoo! Tony: No, Col! Th...
Jules: So, tell me again about the hashbars? Vincent: Okay, what you wanna know? Jules: Hash is legal there in Amsterdam, right? Vincent: Yeah, it's legal, but it ain't a hundred percent legal. I mean, you can't just walk into a restaurant, roll a jo...
Veruca Salt: They're not even trying! They don't want to find it! They're jealous of me! Mr. Salt: Sweetheart, I can't push them no harder; 19,000 bars an hour they're shelling; 760,000 they've done so far. Veruca Salt: You promised, Daddy! You promi...
A free bird leaps on the back of the wind and floats downstream till the current ends and dips his wing in the orange suns rays and dares to claim the sky. But a bird that stalks down his narrow cage can seldom see through his bars of rage his wings ...
His father was IRA and his mother was Quebecois, and they had reliquished their mortal coils in the internecine conflagration that ended their conjoined separatist movement, IRA-Q. The appellation he was given by his progenitors was Ray O'Vaque ("Lik...
We drove down Corydon avenue towards my mother's apartment. How are you doing, she asked me? Fine, fine, I said. I wanted to tell her that I felt I was dying from rage and that I felt guilty about everything and that when I was a kid I woke up every ...
Hey!” The male voice sliced through the noise. Terri ignored him, determined to get back to the bar for her next order. A harsh hand gripped her arm, jerking her back into a firm chest. “I asked your name.” Hot breath reeking of stale beer perm...
The gotta, as in: “I think I’ll stay up another fifteen-twenty minutes, honey, I gotta see how this chapter comes out.” Even though the guy who says it spent the day at work thinking about getting laid and knows the odds are good his wife is go...
You should be spreading the good word. You should be etching the good word onto the glass scanning beds of library photocopiers. You should be scraping the truth onto old auto parts and throwing them off bridges so that people digging in the mud in a...
One weekend it rained for 48 hours without stopping. The rain beat like bony fingers against the window panes. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Fungus was growing on the walls. I polished off a bottle of gin sitting huddled over the two-bar electric fire and...
Sister, why do you do that?" "Do what?" "Cage the animals at night?" "Well..." She looked up and out through the barred window before answering me."We don't want to, Jennings, but we have to. You see, the animals that are given to us we have to take ...
As a songwriter, I'm gathering clues and possibilities all the time, whether I see a piano that day or not. I've tried to explain to people how I collect these dispatches, because I think anybody can do what I'm talking about. Once I do plug in, I mi...
6 months, 2 weeks, 4 days, and I still don’t know which month it was then or what day it is now. Blurred out lines from hangovers to coffee Another vagabond lost to love. 4am alone and on my way. These are my finest moments. I scrub my skin to rid ...
Its hard to stay up. Its been a long long day And you've got the sandman at your door. But hang on, leave the TV on and lets do it anyway. Its ok. You can always sleep through work tomorrow. Ok? Hey, Hey, Tomorrow's just your future yesterday. Tell t...