Carol Connelly: OK, we all have these terrible stories to get over, and you-... Melvin Udall: It's not true. Some of us have great stories, pretty stories that take place at lakes with boats and friends and noodle salad. Just no one in this car. But,...
Colonel Robert G. Shaw: So what do you want to do? Trip: Don't know, sir. Colonel Robert G. Shaw: It stinks, I suppose. Trip: Yeah, It stinks bad. And we all covered up in it too. Ain't nobody clean. Be nice to get clean, though. Colonel Robert G. Sh...
Bruce Baldwin: [Speaking of Walter] You know, Hildy, he's not such a bad fellow. Hildy Johnson: No, he should make some girl real happy. Bruce Baldwin: Uh-huh. Hildy Johnson: [Under her breath] Slap-happy. Bruce Baldwin: He's not the man for you. I c...
Cedric Diggory: I realize I never really thanked you properly for tipping me off about those dragons. Harry: Forget about it. I'm sure you would've done the same for me. Cedric Diggory: Exactly. You know the Prefects' bathroom on the fifth floor? It'...
Waiter: [Hermione hides from Cormac at the Christmas party. Waiter offers hors d'oeuvres] Dragon tartare? Hermione Granger: No, thank you. Harry Potter: I'm fine. Waiter: Just as well. They give you terrible bad breath. Hermione Granger: On second th...
[Harry sees a little boy crying, and Fred and George are comforting him] Fred Weasley: What's your name? Nigel 2nd Year: Nigel. George Weasley: It's gonna be fine, Nigel. Fred Weasley: Yeah, it's not as bad as it seems. See? It's fading already. Geor...
Fred Weasley: Well done, Harry. Wood's just told us. Ron: Fred and George are on the team, too. Beaters. George Weasley: Our job is to make sure that you don't get bloodied up too bad. Can't make any promises, of course. Rough game, Quidditch. Fred W...
Budd: That gentled ya down some. Ain't nobody a badass with a double dose of rock salt that deep in their tits. Not havin tits as fine or big as yours, I can't even imagine how bad that shit must sting... yet I don't want to, neither. [the Bride spit...
Bill: What lies within that dart, just begging to course its way through your veins, is a potent and quite infallible truth serum. I call it "The Undisputed Truth." Twice as strong as sodium penethol, with none of the druggie after-effect. Oh, except...
Sam: By the way, I feel bad. I never asked you how your love life is going. Daniel: [mock chuckles] No. As you know, that was a done deal long ago. Unless, of course, Claudia Schiffer calls, in which case I want you out of the house straight away, yo...
[Sunshine has brought her widow sisters] Sunshine: It is very sad. They have no husbands and they cry. Jack Crabb: Well, that's too bad; I'm sorry. Sunshine: Digging Bear had a baby and lost it. And so did Corn Woman. But Little Elk had no baby at al...
Elizabeth Bennet: Now if every man in the room does not end the evening in love with you then I am no judge of beauty. Jane Bennet: [giggles] Or men. Elizabeth Bennet: [laughs brightly] No, they are far too easy to judge. Jane Bennet: They're not all...
Little John: You know somethin', Robin. I was just wonderin', are we good guys or bad guys? You know, I mean, uh? Our robbin' the rich to feed the poor. Robin Hood: Rob? Tsk tsk tsk. That's a naughty word. We never rob. We just sort of borrow a bit f...
Diane Court: I have this theory of convergence, that good things always happen with bad things. I know you have to deal with them at the same time, but I just don't know why they have to happen at the same time. I just wish I could work out some sche...
Ed: Any zombies out there? Shaun: Don't say that! Ed: What? Shaun: That! Ed: What? Shaun: The zed-word. Don't say it! Ed: Why not? Shaun: Because it's ridiculous! Ed: All right... are there any out there, though? [looking out of the letter-box, he se...
Billy Ansell: Mitchell Stephens, Esquire. Tell me, would you be likely to sue me if I was to beat you right now? I mean, beat you so bad you piss blood and couldn't walk for a month. Because that's what I'm about to do. Mitchell Stephens: No, Mr. Ans...
Cyrus Cole: [telling about his hook hand] Twelve years ago God looked down on me, and He said Cyrus, you're a bad, stupid, selfish man. First I'm gonna fill your body with spirits. Then I'm gonna put you behind the wheel of a car. Then I'm gonna have...
Red: [narrating] Tommy Williams came to Shawshank in 1965 on a two-year stretch for B&E. That's breaking & entering to you. Cops caught him sneaking TV sets out the back door of a JC Penney. Young punk. Mr. Rock and Roll. Cocky as hell. Tommy William...
Guy Forsyth: Did you ever have a job that you hated and worked real hard at? A long, hard day of work. Finally you get to go home, get in bed, close your eyes and immediately you wake up and realize... that the whole day at work had been a dream. It'...
Cowardly Lion: I'll get you anyway, Pee-wee. [Chases Toto; Dorothy hits him on the nose] Dorothy: Shame on you! Cowardly Lion: [Sobbing] Why did you do that for? I didn't bite him. Dorothy: No, but you tried to. It's bad enough picking on a straw man...
Lt. Santino: Gee whiz, Eddie, if you really needed money so bad, then why didn't you come to me? Eddie Valiant: So I took a couple of dirty pictures, kill me. Lt. Santino: I've already got a stiff on my hands, thank you. Eddie Valiant: Huh? Lt. Santi...
