There's a Drunk Midget in My House Ah, babies! They're more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. Like most people who have had one baby, I am an expert on everythiing and will tell you, unsolicited, how to raise your ...
There's nothing better than having a baby. I've always loved children. I used to work summers at the YMCA and be in charge of, like, 30 preschool kids. I knew that when I had a child, I'd be overwhelmed, and it's true... I can't tell you how much my ...
All right,” she said a little sarcastically. “I was going to assume you liked eating babies and sacrificing virgins, but I might as well ask, what do you do for fun?” “I languish in sin,” I replied in the same tone. “I take my babies rare...
Some of you have it ingrained in you. You weren't born with it. No baby has hate for anything. We were all babies once, right? This little guy doesn't care what country you were born in or what religion you might practice or how much you weigh or who...
A person is never as quiet or unrestrained as they seem, or as bad or good, as vulnerable or as strong, as sweet or as feisty; we are thickly layered, page lying upon page, behind simple covers. And love - it is not the book itself, but the binding. ...
My girlfriend just had a baby. We've known each other for six months, so I'm pretty stunned to find myself becoming a father so soon. I hope the baby looks like me!
Oh-" I rest my back against the door to my apartment and purr as I slide down to the floor. "I need to get a tux too." "GREAT. We'll stop at the Tux Boutique tomorrow... while we're out making babies. I mean DELIVERIES. Sorry-" "I'd love that. Making...
Why are you sad?" Baby asked. "Because some day you'll fly higher than high, and the blue will fill your eyes, and maybe you'll forget to come down," said Wishmoley. Baby snuggled next to him. "I'll never forget," she said.
The way you treat me baby Cheat and tell me lies I guess I shouldn't care at all But still I sympathize 'cause you got heart trouble Coming on Yeah you got heart trouble coming on Well you think that you don't need me baby But you're gonna miss me wh...
Life is a series of baby steps along the way and if you add up these tiny little steps you take toward your goal, whatever it is, whether it's giving up something, a terrible addiction or trying to work your way through an illness. When you total up ...
If everyone took personal responsibility for their animals, we wouldn't have a lot of the animal problems that we do. I'm a big spay-and-neuter supporter. Don't have babies if you're not going to take care of those babies. We don't need more. We just...
Juno MacGuff: ...and the receptianist tried to get me to take these condoms that looked like grape suckers and was just babbling away about her freaking boyfiends pie balls! Oh an Su-Chin was there and she was like, "Hi babies have fingernails." Fing...
Jasper: I'm glad you don't take cream or sugar Amigo, losing you and Baby Diego in the same day... would be too hard to bare. Theodore Faron: Well that was even worse, everybody crying. I mean... Baby Diego? Come on, the guy was a wanker! Jasper: Yea...
Dory: [sees a very small baby jellyfish] I shall call him Squishy and he shall be mine and he shall be my Squishy Come on, Squishy Come on, little Squishy... [makes baby talk and slowly touches the jellyfish, getting shocked] Dory: [pulling her fin a...
Tatiana: Nooo! Don't go. I'm scared. Oscar Grant: Scared of what? Tatiana: I hear guns outside. Oscar Grant: You know what, baby? Those are just firecrackers. You'll be safe inside, with your cousin. Tatiana: But what about you Daddy? Oscar Grant: Me...
Angie Gennaro: Did you ever sell to Helene? Bubba Rogowski: There's reasons why there ain't three inches of plexiglass between us right now. That's because I don't fuck with skeezers like Helene. Or coconuts like Cheese. You should know better by now...
Patrick Kenzie: And like that, she was gone. We gave our statements. Nick and Remy the same. All of us spared any blame for Amanda's death. Jack Doyle resigned on the condition that he and he alone be held accountable. He was granted the dignity of e...
[changing his baby son's diaper] Police Chief Aiello: Hey, hey, let Papa change you. Come on, everything will be swell. Come on, come on, come on... [removes the diaper] Police Chief Aiello: What the fuck is this? What is this? Huh? What's that? LOOK...
Roger De Bris: What have you done, L.S.D.? Lorenzo St. DuBois: About six months... but I'm on probation, so it's all good, baby! Roger De Bris: No, I mean, what do you do best? Lorenzo St. DuBois: I can't do that here. That's why they put me away, ba...
Sometimes, to keep things exciting, I decorate my house as if I owned a child. I'll toss a tiny pair of shoes in the hallway or lean small wooden crutches in what I refer to as 'the baby's room,' which is actually a tiny space where I make things. I ...
I'll always have a baby face.
