Roger: Here's a joke, boy. One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to shit, and lands in...
Tucker: [Dale is attracted to one of the college co-eds at the gas station, but hesitates to try to go talk to her] She's just human. Why don't you go over and talk to her? Dale: Talk to her? What... What in the world would I say? Tucker: I don't kno...
[first lines] Doug MacRay: [narrating] Driver's name is Arthur Shea. Former Metro Police officer, fifty-seven years old. Soon as his partner leaves with the coal bag, Artie cracks a Herald, and he don't look up 'til the guy gets back. Marty Maguire. ...
[first lines] Evey Hammond: [voiceover] Remember, remember, the Fifth of November, the Gunpowder Treason and Plot. I know of no reason why the Gunpowder Treason should ever be forgot... But what of the man? I know his name was Guy Fawkes and I know, ...
[Eddie Valiant sits down at the Ink and Paint Club; Marvin Acme squirts ink from his pen on Eddie's shirt and laughs] Eddie Valiant: You think that's funny? Marvin Acme: It's a panic! Eddie Valiant: [grabs Acme by the lapels] You won't think it's fun...
Virgil: [looking at the picture Lindsey took of the alien craft] That's a great shot, Linds. Catfish De Vries: You drop your dive light? Lindsey Brigman: No, come on you guys, come on. Now that's the small one, that's the small one here. You can kind...
[first lines] Terry Fields: Hey, what do you say, Curt? Last night in town... you guys gonna have a little bash before you leave? Steve Bolander: The Moose have been looking for you all day. [hands a check to Curt] Steve Bolander: They got worried......
Trudy Chacon: I'm Trudy. I fly all the science sorties. And this here, is my baby. [tapping on the her helicopter with her hand] Trudy Chacon: Hold on a second. [throws clip board into helicopter] Trudy Chacon: [to Wainfleet, who is installing the gu...
Jake Sully: [Narrating] In cryo, you don't dream at all. It doesn't *feel* like six years - more like a fifth of Tequila and an ass kicking. Tommy was a scientist, not me. He was the one who wanted to get shot light years out in space to find the ans...
[Inside prison laundry] Lamont: [to Derek] Don't fuck with me 'cause I'm the most dangerous man in this prison. You know why? 'Cause I control the underwear. Lamont: [They walk down to the underwear station] All right, pick 'em up over here and you s...
Teacher Kitano: Are my classes boring? Noriko Nakagawa: Yes. Teacher Kitano: How dare you! Noriko Nakagawa: [chuckles] Teacher Kitano: I go into class, you guys look like a pile of potatoes. Slapping them around helped me tell them apart, even got to...
Paul Smecker: [enters the police station, packed with cops] First of all, I'd like to thank whichever one of you donut-munching, barrel-assed, pud-pulling sissies leaked this to the press. That's just what we need now: some sensational story in the p...
My mom believed that you make your own luck. Over the stove she had hung these old, maroon painted letters that spell out, “MANIFEST.” The idea being if you thought and dreamed about the way you wanted your life to be -- if you just envisioned it...
I broke up with this girl, and they put me with a psychiatrist who said, 'Why did you get so depressed, and do all those things you did?' I said, 'I wanted this girl and she left me.' And he said,'Well, we have to look into that.' And I said, 'There'...
You're going to the ball?" Luc asked. "Need an escort?" "I appreciate the offer, but I hear it's all the rage to go stag." He raised his eyebrows. "Besides, I think your brother might take it amiss." "I thought you two were... taking a break?" "I'd l...
Every now and then, we change our minds. It's our prerogative. The big secret is" - I leaned in conspiratorially - "sometimes, even we don't know why. There are times after we pick a fight where we're as confused as you are. But there's no way we're ...
The front door slammed and Dad said, “Aurora, sure you aren’t expecting a package?” I leaned back to find him army-crawling under the window in the living room. Like all dads do. “Already told you no, Rambo.” “The new mailman is back.” ...
This is what we, in the con business, call making a spectacle of ourselves. Let’s try to avoid that from now on.” “Except […] Mr. No-Sex-in-the-Bathrooms is going to describe two probably drunk people who staggered in. Plus, he thinks I’m a...
Elphaba’s face darkened again. Then she asked, hesitantly, as if afraid of the answer, “So, how do you get the evil life force?” “From innocent people, Elphaba,” Nick spoke so quietly he almost whispered. “I must draw the life force from ...
Really, Sage? A date?" I sighed. "Yes, Adrian. A date." A real date. Not, like, doing homework together," he added. "I mean like where you go out to a movie or something. And a movie that's not part of a school assignment. Or about something boring."...
GUYS! Would you give it a rest?" Kevin shouted at them, "You're standing there feeding off each other! Dad – you're trying to prove to Ted why me and Dani are a Bad Thing – because you just can't bring yourself to admit that it isn't, even though...