Jane Burnham: Could he be any more pathetic? Angela Hayes: I think it's sweet. And I think he and your mother have not had sex in a long time.
Carolyn Burnham: You ungrateful little brat! Just look at everything you have. When I was your age, we... lived in a duplex! We didn't even have our own house!
Carolyn Burnham: What the hell do you think you're doing? Lester Burnham: Uh oh! Mom's mad! Bench presses. I'm going to whale on my pecs and then do my back.
Sale House Woman #5: I mean, I think 'lagoon', I think 'waterfall', I think 'tropical'. This is a cement... hole. Carolyn Burnham: Er... I have some tiki torches in the garage...
Frank Lucas: Now, I got no problem with you showin' up in court tomorrow with your head blown in half. Detective Richie Roberts: Get in line. That one stretches around the block too.
Frank Lucas: Ey, ey, ey, ey! Don't rub on that. You Blot that! Ya understand? That's Alpaca. That's $25,000 Alpaca! You blot that shit! You don't rub it, put the club soda on there.
Eva: [after having lunch with a mob boss and his wife] I don't like how they look at us. Like we're the help. Frank Lucas: Yeah? Well now they're working for me.
[from trailer] Frank Lucas: It don't mean nothing to me for you to show up tomorrow morning with your head blown off. Detective Richie Roberts: Get in line. That one stretches around the block.
Detective Richie Roberts: [Referring to Frank Lucas] His seats were phenomenal better seats than Dominic Cattano, Joe Louis shook his hand, who the fuck is this guy?
Peg: [to Laurie] Why are you so depressed? You'll forget him in a week. After you're elected senior Queen, you'll have so many boys after your bod.
John Milner: So, your Judy's little... Shit! How old are you? Carol: I'm old enough. How old are you? John Milner: I'm too old for you. Carol: You can't be that old.
[Just after breaking up] Evelyn Williams: Where are you going? Patrick Bateman: I am just leaving. Evelyn Williams: But where? Patrick Bateman: I have to return some videotapes.
Patrick Bateman: Pumpkin, you're dating the biggest dickweed in New York. Pumpkin, you're dating a tumbling, tumbling dickweed. Courtney Rawlinson: Patrick, stop calling me pumpkin, OK?
Patrick Bateman: [voiceover] I'm on the verge of tears by the time we arrive at Espace, since I'm positive we won't have a decent table. But we do, and relief washes over me in an awesome wave.
Patrick Bateman: Jean, I'm not going to make it... I'm not going to... make it... to the office this afternoon. Jean: [alarmed] What is it, Patrick? Are you all right? Patrick Bateman: Stop sounding so fucking... sad! *Jesus*!
Donald Kimball: [about Paul Allen] And where did he go to school? Patrick Bateman: Don't you know all this? Donald Kimball: I just wanted to know if you know.
Patrick Bateman: Wasn't Rothschild originally handling the Fisher account? How did you get it? Paul Allen: Well, Halberstram, I could tell you... but then I'd have to kill ya.
Donald Kimball: I'm sorry. I should've made an appointment. Was that anything important? Patrick Bateman: Oh, that? Just mulling over business problems, examining opportunities, exchanging rumors, spreading gossip.
Robert Crumb: You turned yourself into a comic hero? Harvey Pekar: Sorta, yeah. But no idealized shit. No phony bullshit. The real thing, y'know? Ordinary life is pretty complex stuff.
Real Harvey: If you think reading comics about your life seems strange, try watching a play about it. God only knows how I'll feel when I see this movie.
Seth: Are you calling me a blimp, you fucking democrat! Davina Vinyard: You know, when was the last time you were able to see your feet? [Seth gives Davina the finger]
