The Fool: I am ignorant, but I read books. You won't believe it, everything is useful... this pebble for instance. Gelsomina: Which one? The Fool: Anyone. It is useful. Gelsomina: What for? The Fool: For... I don't know. If I knew I'd be the Almighty...
The Rabbi: You're unlucky and nothing more than a frame of reference for the lucky Mr. Fisher. You're unlucky, so that I may know that I am not. Unfortunately, the lucky never realised they are lucky until its too late. Take yourself for instance, ye...
Ratso Rizzo: Here I am, goin' to Florida, my leg hurts, my butt hurts, my chest hurts, my face hurts, and like that ain't enough, I gotta pee all over myself. [Joe Buck laughs] Ratso Rizzo: That's funny? I'm fallin' apart here! Joe Buck: It's just - ...
Joel Cairo: I am prepared to pay five thousand dollars for the figure's return. Do you have it? Sam Spade: No. Joel Cairo: But if it isn't here, why did you risk serious injury to prevent my searching for it? Sam Spade: Why should I sit around here a...
Vin: Rojas is makin' room for you in his home. Old Man: Rojas? His conversation would bore me to death! Vin: Yeah, well, [sits on the wooden chair] Vin: maybe somebody else, huh? Old Man: hey are all farmers. Farmers talk of nothing but fertiliser an...
Charlie: Look... I'll give ya $20 to hold ya for now. Michael Longo: What, are ya kidding? $20 doesn't pay the interest for 2 hours. Now, with a vig, it's almost $3000. Charlie: $3000? Shit, you charge a guy from the neighborhood $1800 vig? One day h...
Aunt Edna: You're the ones who sent me the fruitcake for Christmas. It made me so sick! Ellen Griswold: Oh - we're sorry. We thought you enjoyed fruitcake. Aunt Edna: Do you enjoy throwing up every five minutes Claude? Clark: Clark. Aunt Edna: I thou...
Taber: [Taber is picking on Harding as he plays Monopoly with Martini] [pushing his back] Taber: Come on, Harding. Play the game. Play it! Harding: I am playing the game! Stop bothering me! I can't concentrate! Taber: [pushing him again] Play the gam...
Aunt Morag: You know, I am thinking of the piano. She does not play the piano like we do, Nessie. Up. Up! No, she is a strange creature. And her playing is strange, like a mood that passes into you. Up! Now, your playing is plain and true, and that i...
Elizabeth Bennet: Now if every man in the room does not end the evening in love with you then I am no judge of beauty. Jane Bennet: [giggles] Or men. Elizabeth Bennet: [laughs brightly] No, they are far too easy to judge. Jane Bennet: They're not all...
[in a letter to Max] Dirk Calloway: Dear Max, I am sorry to say that I have secretly found out that Mr. Blume is having an affair with Miss Cross. My first suspicions came when I saw them Frenching in front of our house. And then I knew for sure when...
John Hartigan: Roark! Give it up. Let the girl go. Roark Jr.: [holding a young Nancy] You can't do a goddamn thing to me Hartigan. You know who I am. You know who my father is! You can't touch me, you piece of shit cop! Look at you, you can't even li...
Borg Queen: You are in chaos, Data. You are the contradiction: a machine who wishes to be human. Lieutenant Commander Data: Since you seem to know so much about me, you must be aware I am programmed to evolve. To better myself. Borg Queen: We too are...
Captain of Guards: [to Shrek, after finding him and Donkey in the woods] You there! Ogre! Shrek: Aye? Captain of Guards: [to both Shrek and Donkey] By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am authorized to place you both under arrest and transport you to a d...
C-3PO: I do believe they think I am some kind of god. Han Solo: Well, why don't you use your divine influence and get us out of this? C-3PO: I beg your pardon General Solo, but that just wouldn't be proper. Han Solo: Proper? C-3PO: It's against my pr...
Marianne: When is a man to be safe from such wit if age and infirmity do not protect him? Elinor Dashwood: Infirmity? Mrs. Dashwood: If Colonel Brandon is infirm then I am at death's door. Elinor Dashwood: It is a miracle your life has extended this ...
Stan: Hey, Mole. You know where the "clitoris" is? The Mole: Ze what? Stan: The "clitoris." I have to have to find the clitoris so I can get this Wendy girl to like me again. [the Mole grasps Stan] The Mole: Hey, you have to stop thinking with your d...
Baka: They use the old ones to do the work of greasing the stones, Lord Prince. If they are killed, it is no loss. Moses: Are you a master builder or a master butcher? Baka: If we stop moving stones for every grease woman who falls, the city would ne...
Joe Turner: Listen. I work for the CIA. I am not a spy. I just read books! We read everything that's published in the world. And we... we feed the plots - dirty tricks, codes - into a computer, and the computer checks against actual CIA plans and ope...
Marv: [Bud has been ignoring him] What the hell is the matter with you? Things are so bad out there even the lifers are complaining, but not you. No. You're pulling in big money. So what's the score huh... Bud Fox: Hey LOOK! I am SICK and TIRED of pl...
Rorschach: I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in threatening world. Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pic...
