I am the Secretary of Secrecy. I’ve got filing cabinets and safes full of Shh! That’s also where I store all my love for you.
I have an Unexplained Flying Erection. I also have a floating picture of my dead grandma. The two are unrelated. Long live the queen!
While I’m no Major League Baseball prospect, I have thrown a few no-hitters in my day. And not only were there no hitters, there was also nobody there to catch.
I know sex sells. I also know gametes are sex cells. Her and I had chemistry together, and that’s just biology.
A ball is a great place to dance, or a great thing to dribble. A ball is also a great thing to scratch when it's itchy and sweaty.
I found out who my real dad is on Facebook. I also found out who he isn’t. He isn’t the man I thought he isn’t.
I wrote a thesis on love, and I wrote it in lipstick. Of course, I also got blood on the paper, because the lipstick was still attached to her cheating lips.
Islam deals not only with what man must and must not do, but also with what he needs to know. In other words, Islam is both a way of acting and doing things and a way of knowing.
I got offended when she laughed, because she was showing pleasure, but she was also showing displeasure—in all the previous moments where she hadn’t laughed.
This place reminds me of the time I had amnesia. I think. It also reminds me of being in love. That must mean I’m lost.
I want to buy “A Touch of Gray,” because I’d look more distinguished with a touch of gray in my hair. Also, geriatrics make better lovers.
Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other acceptable answers are Dora J. Arod and Jarod Ora.
My zip code is my salary. Too bad I live in 32256 and not 90210. Also, I lied—but only because the zip code 00000 does not exist.
I’m trying to be a better gangsta, so I’m learning how to play the ukulele. I'm also trying to figure out how to rap a romance novel, like The Notebook.
The beauty of the ocean, it takes your breath away. Especially if you’re underwater. She also took my breath away. She suffocated me with her love.
People think I’m all gloom and doom all the time. I’m not. I also have bad days where I’m pessimistic.
For my birthday, a few of my wealthier friends got me a pot to piss in. Also, they were kind enough to fill it up with cat litter.
Poor Chad. Not the country, but the guy. Oh, and the country’s poor too. I feel so bad for Chad. I also feel so bad for Chad.
I've never had a one-night stand with anybody over the course of a whole weekend. I've also never had a one-night stand while standing the whole time.
I also don't turn into a bat or sparkle in the sun. Hollywood's portrayal of vampires is almost as accurate as its portrayal of prostitution in Pretty Woman.
What she was finding also was how one book led to another, doors kept opening wherever she turned and the days weren't long enough for the reading she wanted to do.
