[in the waiting room of the afterlife] Barbara: Adam, is this what happens when you die? Receptionist: This is what happens when *you* die. [points at a gaunt man smoking] Receptionist: That is what happens when *he* dies. [points at a woman cut in h...
Lydia: Are you the guys hiding out in the attic? Adam: We're ghosts! Lydia: What do you look like under there? Adam: Aren't you scared? Lydia: I'm not scared of sheets. Are you gross under there? Are you Night of the Living Dead under there? Like all...
Timothy Cavendish: [narrating] While my extensive experience as an editor has led me to a disdain for flashbacks and flash forwards and all such tricksy gimmicks I believe that if you, dear Reader, can extend your patience for just a moment, you will...
Nurse Noakes: You are going to be sorry in ways you cannot even imagine. Mr. Meeks: [shrieks to draw attention of the crowd in the pub] Are there no true Scotsmen in the house? Those there English gerrunts are trampling all over my God-given rights! ...
[first lines] Zachry: [shivering beside the fire] Oh, lonesome night. And babbits bawling, the wind biting the bone. Wind like this... full of voices. Ancestry howling at you, yibbering stories, all voices tied up into one. One voice differing. One v...
Roger Strong: Frank, would you like to say grace? [Long pause] Roger Strong: Unless you're not comfortable. Frank Abagnale, Jr.: Absolutely. Two little mice fell into a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned, but the second mous...
[Discussing a new prisoner who has to spend the night in the box] Dragline: He ain't in the box because of the joke played on him. He back-sassed a free man. They got their rules. We ain't got nothin' to do with that. Would probably have happened to ...
[about a bum on a park bench] Ann: Every time I see one of those old guys, I always think the same thing. Mark: What do you think? Ann: I always think that he was once somebody's baby boy. Really, I do. I think he was once somebody's baby boy, and he...
Top Dollar: You ain't lost everything. Gideon: Yeah? And maybe you're not such a big shot, either! [Grange restrains him] Gideon: Ow! Jesus! Top Dollar: Fair enough. Catch. [Top Dollar tosses an eyeball at him] Gideon: Jesus. Top Dollar: Say hello to...
Rick: Don't you sometimes wonder if it's worth all this? I mean what you're fighting for. Victor Laszlo: You might as well question why we breathe. If we stop breathing, we'll die. If we stop fighting our enemies, the world will die. Rick: Well, what...
Nicky Santoro: Ace don't... listen, don't... don't make a scene, all right? Ace Rothstein: I want to just talk. I want to talk to that Irish bitch. Nicky Santoro: She didn't know who to turn to. She... she didn't know where to turn. She was tryin' to...
Nicky Santoro: [voice-over] A lot of holes in the desert, and a lot of problems are buried in those holes. But you gotta do it right. I mean, you gotta have the hole already dug before you show up with a package in the trunk. Otherwise, you're talkin...
Frank Marino: [Narrating] What could I say? If I had given them the wrong answer, I mean, Nicky, Ginger, Ace - all of them could have wind up getting killed. Because there's one thing you gotta know about these old timers, they don't like any fucking...
Papa: [playing chess with Dola] What's come over you, my dear? It's not like you to challenge a ship like Goliath. You know, the odds are against you. Dola: I'm after treasure. That's all. Papa: [Chuckling] I must admit, those kids are cute! Dola: Wh...
Clark: Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're g...
Sister Aloysius Beauvier: May I ask what you are writing down with that ball-point pen? Father Brendan Flynn: Oh, nothing. It's an idea for a sermon. Sister Aloysius Beauvier: You have one right now? Father Brendan Flynn: I get them all the time. Sis...
Donnie: You're such a fuck-ass! Rose Darko: Please. Elizabeth: What? Did you just call me a "fuck-ass"? Rose Darko: Elizabeth, that's enough. Elizabeth: You can go suck a fuck. Donnie: Oh, please, tell me, Elizabeth, how exactly does one suck a fuck?...
Roger: [over the radio while driving trucks] Hey, too tall, too slow, two, come back! Peter: You look my size when you're sitting in a truck. Roger: What I want to know is how we got to be in the same force with you being so large and all? Peter: Wel...
Roger: Aww, God! Oh, Jesus Christ! Peter: What is it? Roger: My bag! I left my goddamn bag in the other truck! Peter: [stops driving the truck] All right, trooper, you better screw your head on. Roger: [hyped tone] Yeah, yeah, yeah; c'mon, c'mon c'mo...
Boolie Werthan: What I need is for somebody to drive my mother around Hoke Colburn: Well, if you don' mind my askin', sir, how come she's not hirin' for herself? Boolie Werthan: See, it's kind of a delicate situation. Hoke Colburn: Oh, yessir, yessir...
Dwayne T. Robinson: We don't know shit, Powell. If there's hostages, how come nobody's come to us with ransom demands, huh? If there's terrorists in there, where's their list of demands? All we know is that somebody shot your car up. It's probably th...