Seaman Jones: [Jonesy is teaching Beaumont] Hear it now? Beaumont: [resigned] No. Seaman Jones: Beaumont, at Caltech we used to do this in our sleep! You hear it now? Beaumont: Wait a minute... Seaman Jones: Uh oh... Beaumont: Disparaged surface clut...
Ron Weasley: [about Ginny and Dean] What do you think he sees in her? Harry Potter: She's smart... funny... attractive... Ron Weasley: Attractive? Harry Potter: Well you know... she has nice... skin. Ron Weasley: So you think he is going out with her...
[Harry gulps down the Felix Felicis] Hermione Granger: How do you feel? Harry Potter: Excellent... really excellent! Hermione Granger: Remember, Slughorn usually eats early, takes a walk, and then returns to his office. Harry Potter: Right. I'm going...
Draco Malfoy: [looking at Harry's broken nose] Nice face, Potter! [Harry nods disdainfully; Luna pulls out her wand] Luna Lovegood: Would you like me to fix it for you? Personally, I think you look a little more devil-may-care this way, but it's up t...
Lavender Brown: [runs into the hospital wing, after Ron's been poisoned] Where is he? Where's my Won-Won? Has he been asking for me? [sees Hermione sitting next to Ron's bed] Lavender Brown: What is she doing here? Hermione Granger: [stands] I might ...
Harry Potter: First we've got to find a place to practice where Umbridge won't find out. Ginny Weasley: The Shrieking Shack? Harry Potter: It's too small. Hermione Granger: The Forbidden Forest? Ron Weasley: Not bloody likely! Ginny Weasley: Harry, w...
Lucius Malfoy: [walking with Bellatrix slowly up to Harry] Haven't you always wondered what was the reason for the connection between you and the Dark Lord. Why he was unable to kill you when you were just an infant. Don't you want to know the secret...
[Hermione screams as Grawp grabs her and lifts her up] Rubeus Hagrid: Grawpy, that is not polite! Ron Weasley: Hagrid, do something! Rubeus Hagrid: We talked about this! You do not grab, do you? That is your new friend, Hermione! [Ron swings a tree b...
Seamus Finnigan: Me mam didn't want me to come back this year. Harry Potter: Why not? Seamus Finnigan: [sarcastically] Let me see... because of you! The Daily Prophet's been saying a lot of things about you, Harry. About Dumbledore as well. Harry Pot...
Sirius Black: Fudge is using all his power, including his influence at the Daily Prophet, to smear anyone who claims the Dark Lord has returned. Harry Potter: Why? Remus Lupin: The Minister thinks Dumbledore's after his job. Harry Potter: But that's ...
Catherine: So are you, um... are you seeing anybody? Theodore: Yeah, um, I've been seeing somebody for the last few months. Longest I've wanted to be with somebody since we split up. Catherine: Well, you seem really good. Theodore: Thanks. I, um... a...
Mr. Ollivander: Curious... very curious... Harry: Sorry, but what's curious? Mr. Ollivander: I remember every wand I've ever sold, Mr. Potter. It so happens that the phoenix whose tailfeather resides in your wand gave another feather... just one othe...
Professor Severus Snape: There will be no foolish wand-waving or silly incantations in this class. As such, I don't expect many of you to appreciate the subtle science and exact art that is potion-making. However, for those select few... [stares at D...
Professor McGonagall: Nothing, I repeat, nothing gives a student the right to walk about the school at night. Therefore, as punishment for your actions, 50 points will be taken. Harry: 50? [Ron and Hermione also looking shocked, Draco smirking] Profe...
[first lines] Heather: So even if Columbus got lost and wasn't the first to discover America, he's still my hero. He was really brave to sail in such a tiny ship over a really big ocean. And because of him, we get Columbus Day off of school. Teacher:...
Bobby Jordan: Give me that. Bobby's Buddy: [passing Bobby a liquor bottle, then spotting Jack and Judy smoking a joint together] Hey, isn't that, that Stall faggot? Bobby Jordan: Yeah. Bobby's Buddy: You should go kick his ass. Bobby Jordan: I'm goin...
Manfred: Here's your little bundle of joy. We're returning it to the humans. Sid: Awww, the big bad tigey-wigey gets left behind. Poor Tigey-Wigey. Manfred: Sid, Tigey-Wigey's gonna lead the way. Sid: Uh, Manny, can I-can I-can I talk to you for a se...
Manfred: [to Scrat] Hey, buddy. Have you seen any humans go by here? [Scrats mimes charade game] Sid: Ooh, ooh, ooh! I love this game, I love this game! Let's see. First word... [Scrat mimes packing down snow] Sid: Stomp. No, Stamp. Manfred: Let me t...
Fredrick Zoller: [shouting to the camera, acting in Nation's Pride] Who wants to send a message to Germany? [Nation's Pride is interrupted by Shosanna's movie] Shosanna Dreyfus: I have a message for Germany. [Hitler and Goebbels watch in shock] Shosa...
[Nazi Colonel Vogel is torturing Henry to get answers] Colonel Vogel: Tell me about this miserable little diary of yours. The book is useless and yet you come all the way back to Berlin to get it. Why? [he slaps Henry in the face with his glove] Colo...
Louis: 1791 was the year it happened. I was 24, younger than you are now. But times were different then, I was a man at that age: the master of a large plantation just south of New Orleans. I had lost my wife in childbirth, and she and the infant had...