[Dana, possessed by "The Gatekeeper," answers the door] Dana Barrett: Are you the Keymaster? Dr. Peter Venkman: Not that I know of. [She slams the door in his face. Venkman knocks again] Dana Barrett: Are you the Keymaster? Dr. Peter Venkman: Yes. Ac...
Kim: Actually, we're paying you a compliment cause we're gonna do some stupid shit, but that's ok, cause we're stunt people, we ain't got good sense, but you've got good sense, and anybody with good sense ain't gonna wanna do what we're doin'.
[At the altar, just before Peter is married] Peter: No surprises? Mark: No surprises. Peter: Not like the stag night? Mark: Unlike the stag night. Peter: Do you admit the Brazilian prostitutes were a mistake? Mark: I do. Peter: And it would have been...
Karen: So what's this big news, then? Daisy: [excited] We've been given our parts in the nativity play. And I'm the lobster. Karen: The lobster? Daisy: Yeah! Karen: In the nativity play? Daisy: [beaming] Yeah, *first* lobster. Karen: There was more t...
[having just been exposed kissing Natalie on a school stage during a student concert in front of hundreds of children and parents] Prime Minister: Right. So, not quite as secret as we'd hoped. Natalie: What do we do now? Prime Minister: Smile. Little...
Karen: The trouble with being the Prime Minister's sister is, it does put your life into rather harsh perspective. What did my brother do today? He stood up and fought for his country. And what did I do? I made a papier maché lobster head.
Daniel: And her name's Joanna? Sam: Yeah, I know, just like Mum. Spooky. Daniel: Well, in one way then, we're in luck. At least we still have the god-like genius of Scott Walker. [he puts Scott Walker's "Joanna" on the stereo, and they lip-sync to it...
Daniel: I'm afraid that there's somethin' really wrong, you know. I mean, clearly it's about his mum, but Christ, he might be injecting heroin into his eyeballs for all I know. Karen: At the age of eleven? Daniel: Well, maybe not his eyeballs, then. ...
Prime Minister: I'd like to go to Wandsworth; the dodgy end. PM's chauffeur, Terry: Very good, sir. [they drive to Wandsworth] PM's chauffeur, Terry: Harris Street. What number, sir? Prime Minister: Oh, God. It's the longest street in the world, and ...
Daniel: [knocks on Sam's door] Sam, time for dinner. Sam: I'm not hungry. Daniel: Sam... I've done chicken kebabs! Sam: Look at the sign on the door. [he starts practising his drums; Daniel leans back and looks at the sign, which says, "I SAID - I'M ...
John: So, what do you reckon to our new Prime Minister, then? Judy: Oh, I like him. I can't understand why he's not married, though. John: Well, you know the type. He's, uh, married to his job. Either that, or gay as a picnic basket.
[In the airport, Daniel, Carol, Sam, and Carol's son are waiting. Joanna appears at the gate] Sam: There she is! [he runs to her] Joanna Anderson: Hi! [Sam wants to kiss her, but holds back] Sam: Hello. Daniel: [watching] Agh! He should have kissed h...
Harry: Right, the Christmas party. Not my favorite night of the year, and your unhappy job to organize. Mia: Tell me. Harry: Well, it's basic, really. Find a venue, over-order on the drinks, bulk-buy the guacamole and advise the girls to avoid Kevin ...
Frankie Dunn: I'm gonna get you out of here. These doctors around here don't know squat. Otherwise, why would they be living out here in the desert? As soon as you're able to be moved, we'll find someplace where they've actually studied medicine,
Vinny Gambini: [Vinny and Lisa receive their breakfast orders, Vinny looks at his skeptically] Whats this over here? Grits Cook: You never heard of grits? Vinny Gambini: Sure I've heard of grits. I just never actually *seen* a grit before.
Sol Robeson: The Ancient Japanese considered the Go board to be a microcosm of the universe. Although when it is empty it appears to be simple and ordered, in fact, the possibilities of gameplay are endless. They say that no two Go games have ever be...
Phillip Morgan: Rupert only publishes books HE likes... usually philosophy. Janet Walker: Oh. Small print, big words, no sales. Brandon Shaw: Rupert's extremely radical. Do you know that he selects his books on the assumption that people not only can...
Eli: I'm worried about you, Richie. Richie: Why? Eli: Well, actually, Margot is, for some reason. But I did find it odd when you said you were in love with her. She's married you know. Richie: Yeah. Eli: And she's your sister. Richie: Adopted.
[from trailer] Spock: Captain, I cannot allow you to do this! Bones: Jim, you're not actually going after this guy, are you? James T. Kirk: I have no idea what I'm supposed to do! I only know what I *can* do!
Sweeney Todd: What is that? Mrs. Lovett: It's fop, / Finest in the shop. / Or we have shepherd's pie peppered with actual shepherd on top. And I've just begun. Here's the politician, so oily it's served on a doily, have one.
John McLaughlin: On a scale of 0 to 10 - zero being impossible, ten being complete metaphysical certitude - what are the chances the Russians will actually attack the United States? Pat Buchanan. Pat Buchanan: Zero. The Soviets would never risk going...
