Quotes by Mark Twain

About Mark Twain:

Samuel Langhorne Clemens was an American author and humorist. He wrote The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1876) and its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1885), the latter often called "The Great American Novel".
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

The educated Southerner has no use for an 'r', except at the beginning of a word.

Mark Twain

Ideally a book would have no order to it, and the reader would have to discover his own.

Mark Twain

Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.

Mark Twain

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

Mark Twain

Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied.

Mark Twain

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

Mark Twain

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

Mark Twain

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.

Mark Twain

He is now rising from affluence to poverty.

Mark Twain

The Public is merely a multiplied 'me.'

Mark Twain

One should never use exclamation points in writing. It is like laughing at your own joke.

Mark Twain

Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.

Mark Twain

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to d...

Mark Twain

It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.

Mark Twain

When angry, count four. When very angry, swear.

Mark Twain

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

Mark Twain

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.

Mark Twain

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

Mark Twain

The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.

Mark Twain

I have been scientifically studying the traits and dispositions of the “lower animals” (so-called,) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result profoundly humiliating to me. For it obliges me to renounce my all...

Mark Twain

The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.

Mark Twain

Author Bio

  • NameMark Twain
  • DescriptionAmerican author and humorist
  • AliasesSamuel Langhorne Clemens; Samuel Clemens
  • BornNovember 30, 1835
  • DiedApril 21, 1910
  • CountryUnited States Of America
  • ProfessionJournalist; Humorist; Novelist; Children's Writer; Autobiographer
  • WorksAdventures Of Huckleberry Finn; The Adventures Of Tom Sawyer