The uncertainty, the fear of the unknown was driving him, almost to the point of desperation. He felt as if he was going down a dark stairway, missing a step, hurtling into the unknown and having no idea where he would land.
What's the rush? Recognise that with the time at our disposal, there is only a limited number of good books you can read, a few really good movies worth seeing, and a finite number of hours, days, years to enjoy them!