Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

About Jeff Foxworthy:

Jeffrey Marshall is an American stand-up comedian, actor, television and radio personality, author, and voice artist. He is a member of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, a comedy troupe which also comprises Larry the Cable Guy, Bill Engvall, and Ron White. Known for his "You might be a redneck" one-liners, Foxworthy has released six major-label comedy albums. His first two albums were each certified 3× Platinum by the Recording Industry Association of America. Foxworthy has written several books based on his redneck jokes, as well as an autobiography entitled No Shirt, No Shoes... No Problem!.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'

Jeff Foxworthy

I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument.

Jeff Foxworthy

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.

Jeff Foxworthy

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed with my in-laws, which on life's list of experiences ranks right below sitting in a tub full of scissors.

Jeff Foxworthy

I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.

Jeff Foxworthy

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

Jeff Foxworthy

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.

Jeff Foxworthy

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

Jeff Foxworthy

My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!

Jeff Foxworthy

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

Jeff Foxworthy

My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this.

Jeff Foxworthy

You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

Jeff Foxworthy

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

Jeff Foxworthy

Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.

Jeff Foxworthy

I know God is real.

Jeff Foxworthy

We're all screwed up. And the way Christians mess things up is we act like we've got it going on. And if we would just stay in that place of, 'Hey, we're all screwed up and but for the grace of God, none of us have a shot here.' We need to have a sen...

Jeff Foxworthy

I love comedy. God has given me this platform.

Jeff Foxworthy

Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work.

Jeff Foxworthy

I really don't require a whole lot in life.

Jeff Foxworthy

It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.

Jeff Foxworthy

Author Bio

  • NameJeff Foxworthy
  • DescriptionAmerican stand-up comedian
  • BornSeptember 6, 1958
  • CountryUnited States Of America
  • ProfessionActor; Writer