Quotes by Groucho Marx

About Groucho Marx:

Julius Henry was an American comedian and film and television star. He was known as a master of quick wit and widely considered one of the best comedians of the modern era. His rapid-fire, often impromptu delivery of innuendo-laden patter earned him many admirers and imitators.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.

Groucho Marx

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

Groucho Marx

Room service? Send up a larger room.

Groucho Marx

Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?

Groucho Marx

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

Groucho Marx

If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.

Groucho Marx

There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, 'Yes,' you know he is a crook.

Groucho Marx

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

Groucho Marx

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!

Groucho Marx

I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

Groucho Marx

Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.

Groucho Marx

Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.

Groucho Marx

Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.

Groucho Marx

Go, and never darken my towels again.

Groucho Marx

My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.

Groucho Marx

I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member.

Groucho Marx

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.

Groucho Marx

Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.

Groucho Marx

I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract.

Groucho Marx

I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.

Groucho Marx

Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

Groucho Marx

Author Bio

  • NameGroucho Marx
  • DescriptionAmerican comedian
  • BornOctober 2, 1890
  • DiedAugust 19, 1977
  • CountryUnited States Of America
  • ProfessionActor
  • AwardsCommandeur Des Arts Et Des Lettres?