Quotes by Fran Lebowitz

About Fran Lebowitz:

Frances Ann "Fran" Lebowitz is an American author and public speaker. Lebowitz is known for her sardonic social commentary on American life as filtered through her New York City sensibilities. Some reviewers have called her a modern-day Dorothy Parker.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.

Fran Lebowitz

Andy Warhol made fame more famous.

Fran Lebowitz

If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.

Fran Lebowitz

You're only as good as your last haircut.

Fran Lebowitz

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.

Fran Lebowitz

Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.

Fran Lebowitz

As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

Fran Lebowitz

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Fran Lebowitz

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Fran Lebowitz

Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you.

Fran Lebowitz

Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.

Fran Lebowitz

Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.

Fran Lebowitz

The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.

Fran Lebowitz

In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.

Fran Lebowitz

I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word - politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit.

Fran Lebowitz

Do not, on a rainy day, ask your child what he feels like doing, because I assure you that what he feels like doing, you won't feel like watching.

Fran Lebowitz

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

Fran Lebowitz

My favorite animal is steak.

Fran Lebowitz

I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.

Fran Lebowitz

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.

Fran Lebowitz

When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.

Fran Lebowitz

Author Bio

  • NameFran Lebowitz
  • Descriptionauthor and public speaker from the United States
  • AliasesFrances Ann Lebowitz
  • BornOctober 27, 1950
  • CountryUnited States Of America
  • ProfessionWriter